Day 140 – Living Commitment – Day 12 of 21. Sit down and breathe.

When I sit down.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I sit down immediately go into thoughts/thinking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that when I sit down it is natural to go into thoughts and thinking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect sitting down to “I must think”, instead of simply breathing, not realizing that as soon as I think or participate within thoughts I start creating things that isn’t here and that only fucks with my day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Automatically go into thoughts and thinking when I sit down, within the belief that I must be thinking and having thoughts when I sit down just to show that I am “busy” and not simply relaxing and doing nothing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that when I sit down I must keep myself busy and distracted within the mind as thoughts/thinking otherwise I might seem like I am just relaxing and not doing anything but breathing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see “just breathing” as not being productive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that when I sit down I must have thoughts and think about shit in order to be/continue being productive, seeing and realizing that this is a creation or Consumerism where we are taught that we must always be productive and not simply live as breathing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that the only products” I get out of thinking and having thoughts are stress/fear/anxiety/tiredness/projections/desires and everything else that leads to me believing I must go do something after I sat down and spend money and be a good robot consumer as I was brainwashed to be as if it is the only way I can exist in this life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the thoughts I have in my mind and the typical thinking methods I have is exactly the same as a TV or Radio, and that it is constantly only motivating me to be a consumer in all parts of Capitalism, never realizing that I am here as Breathe always moving and talking and being busy as if that is the meaning of life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that TV and Radio is inventions of the human as the mind as thoughts/thinking and that the TV and radio and all other media is but a manifestation of the mind, thus whenever I am sitting down or relaxing I am never really relaxing or stopping stress of fear I am simply creating it through the process of thinking and participating in thoughts as they are always from the past and projected into the future sending the body within the thinking/thought process back and forth in time putting the body under heaps of stress/anxiety causing all kinds of diseases and so create a world that is but on big disease for all.

I commit myself to when and as I sit down to breathe without any judgment of what is right or wrong but to simply breathe for myself here.

I commit myself to when and as I sit down to breathe and not be influenced by my environment to start thinking and back chatting and having thoughts, as I understand that it would simply proof to me I am a automatic robot if I do start thinking and having thought and back chat through environmental influences – thus confirming that I am simply a program that responds to input and thus being programmed by the environment.

I commit myself to when as and as I sit down to BREATH and not participate in thoughts/thinking as habit and as a automated thing, as I realize that only brainwashed and mind controlled people and machines have automated settings.

I commit myself to stop the TV and all forms of media within my head to stop the disease that the world has become and to rebirth myself as life as breathe as the physical so that I can be the cure that spreads as LIFE that is best for all LIFE.

Day 139 – Living Commitments – Day 11 of 21.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my own thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I create each and every thought I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to victimize myself to the thoughts I have as if they are happening to me, seeing and realizing that within this I am giving away my power to stop the thoughts as me as the creator.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that all thoughts I have come from me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that all thoughts is for the past, as they come from memories stored in the flesh in space and time and that I have accepted and allowed to consume my life and to keep me in the past and re-creating the past as I project them in my eyes in the present and the future, only ever seeing the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that every time I have a thought it is the past that I am projecting within me as a False image of reality and thus when I follow the thought I will end up only repeating the past, because my mind took the past and made it seem a bit better and thus I follow it only to find out it’s the same in reality and thus only always creating the past and thus Abusing myself and LIFE here on earth as I never learn and change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that thoughts are not real and cannot be trusted at all as they exist as an energetic experience within my mind and as a illusion re-presentation of reality and thus it cannot be trusted one bit as reality is obviously HERE and not in the MIND.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FOOLISHLY belief that I can move and direct myself through using the mind that is energy based and that can change and will change every single second, where as the PHYSICAL is HERE and can be trusted with being here as it is stable and REAL and not energy based as the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust something such as the mind, not considering that within the mind anyone can make up ANYTHING they want anytime about anything, yet with this considered as being possible in the mind we still follow this same thing (the Mind) within making LIFE changing decisions, not seeing and realizing that it can and will change (the decision) anytime as the mind is energy based, based on how you feel and what information has been put into you, and because we belief that mind is who we are we accept and allow the energy to move and direct us like ROBOTS getting a quick upload on the mission, instead of being here Physically where no energy decides but breath and common sense always based on what is real as the physical that isn’t limited or enslaved to any form of energy such as thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I have given all power to the mind as thoughts, as soon as I have a thought I immediately without question accept and allow it to decide for me how I will feel – either good or bad and then to actually direct my life according to that, how ridiculous it that – no free choice and no self will.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that as long as Humans give power to the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions all abuse on earth will continue till life as we know it ends, as thoughts/feelings/emotions are the things that all EVIL has in common, as it does not matter if you are a lover or a rapist – both consist out of the same mixture of thoughts/feelings/emotions and thus as long as we accept and allow one though/feeling/emotion to exist we are accepting and allowing all of them to exist – RAPE/MURDER/CRUELTY name them all.

I commit myself to show that if all human being has to stop their mind and STOP thoughts and feeling and emotions – all abuse on earth will end, as everything we currently do is based on how we thing and feel – thus if people simple breathe and LIVE here in the physical as LIFE then there is no EVIL as evil only come from the mind where there is Secret.


Day 138 – Living commitments – Day 10 of 21.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that thoughts are not real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that thoughts are “reality” taken and placed within the mind as an illusion version of the mind, never showing the true face of what is really here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow thoughts just because they seem more appealing to me, just like a bug that goes to the light only to find out it is a Bug killing machine.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value thoughts more than actual reality and to within this always following the “dream” within my mind and never really see what is going on here on earth as this reality, as I constantly take the past and project it within thought, as thoughts i parts of reality that is made different within the mind and place it over the future as a projection, always living in the past and the future and never being here present in fact in awareness and thus only living a lie that leads to the consequences we are faced with, where reality as earth is neglected and abused and on its way to destruction because of us not being able to see it due to the blinding of living as thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for “false” images and to neglect the real Image here as the physical reality just because the false images look better and more appealing, not seeing and realizing that the false images as thoughts can only look appealing because of what has/is being accepted and allowed to manifest in the flesh on earth through our participation in the mind as thoughts, and thus we are the cause and the effect of all that is here that we Fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow thoughts and the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing reality without thoughts as I understand that without thoughts to distract me and to present false images to me I will only see truth as that which is here in and as the physical and will have no choice but to take self responsibility.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the truth as what is here as the physical as this reality though hiding and covering the truth up with thoughts and illusions of the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide and cower behind thoughts in the fear of what I know is here as this physical reality as that which we have accepted and allowed to manifest and that I must take self responsibility if I stop all thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that if I stop thoughts that I will be faced with reality as myself as who I am, and that breath is the one point as the physical I can support myself with and stabilize myself with to walk and to change what is here as myself as all life one and equal.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that I use thoughts to hide truth and that the only truth that is here is what is being denied, as the only thing that is being denied is this physical reality as the evidence is visible in Life as we know it here on earth as total abuse of LIFE.

I commit myself to when as I see myself within thoughts to stop and breathe and to realize that it is a mechanism I have created to hide the reality of life as the truth as that which is here because I have made what is in my mind as more and better, and to realize that as long as I participate within thoughts I will only exist as the illusion of thoughts and the continuation of the Abuse will lead to the end of life as we know it, and thus it is within the best interest of all Life as ME to stop thoughts and take immediate self responsibility in and as the physical as the truth – and that I can only take self responsibility if I can see the truth and that is to stop all thoughts and wipe my EYE balls cleaned and see what is here, and to BREATH instead of thought and to birth myself as breathe as life here in and as the physical one and equal and to bring about a world that IS best for all life.


Day 137 – Living Commitments – Day 9 of 21. – raised to Trust the Mind

Day 137 – Living Commitments – Day 9 of 21. – raised to Trust the Mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a failure when and as I find myself not breathing but instead thinking and participating within the mind.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to instead of judging myself as a failure to instead immediately as the correction breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to instead of realizing the mistake and to correct myself immediately effectively to judge myself and to within the judgment go into the back chat of - it is now to late I have already fallen” and to within this give the mind permission to continue and fucking with my day, realizing that I am the creator of this and thus in a single breathe I can stop and stop fucking with myself and Forgive myself and move on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into feeling hopelessness when I find myself within the mind thinking and talking to myself, within the belief that I will never be able to stop the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give the experience of feeling hopelessness power and validation through not breathing and to participate within it, realizing that this is how I am creating it and manifesting it and that it takes a single breath at a time and stop.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that I am a victim to all experiences I have of the mind that has physical impact on the body, realizing that I can stop through breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make myself subject to any or all experiences I have of and as the mind that has physical manifestations in my body as my body such as moods, feeling drained of energy, tiredness, headaches and more. And to belief that as I am experiencing the physical effects of the mind on the body I am to late and breath cannot save me, realizing that it is exactly what will help, simply breathing and being here and stopping the mind feeding the systems that had physical outflows on the body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget the simplicity of the solutions to stopping the mind as breathe – realizing that I have not yet realized breathe as myself and that I also have not yet fully grasp/understand the mind and what and how the mind functions and the consequential outflows of the mind on the body, thus I allow and accept the mind to run wild and free as a form of Trust.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to TRUST the mind and whatever the mind throws at me and whatever the body is experiencing as the mind,.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I have in space and time placed all my trust in the mind and not the breathe as life, thus I will as a “natural” thing turn to the mind in trust, instead of breathe as that which in fact gives me life as the breathe, not seeing and realizing that the trust I place in my MIND that I have developed through many Blind years as to not having any understanding of what and how the mind functions, thus the trust is blind, even if the mind led me off cliffs and into fires, as it was all I knew.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Trust something simply because It is all I know as having the knowledge and information as it, but not in fact how it works and what it is in fact, thus the knowing isn’t really knowing but only a matter of being used to it, even if I have to follow it to the end of the world because it is all I built my trust on, a trust that is based in fear and self interest as the cause and the effect of the current world we life in as the living hell for all in the debts of money.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I have placed all my trust in the mind yet I do not even understand the mind or how it works and manifests in this reality and yet I belief it and everything it throws at me, seeing and realizing that I must re-evaluate my trust within myself as Breathe where I decide and direct and not some thoughts or form of back chatting and having conversations with myself or even where feelings or emotions make decisions for me, this is not acceptable as it is in fact not trust worthy at all as I am not the one directing and moving myself but being directed and moved by the mind.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself predicating in the mind as thoughts or even where I have followed them a bit to not judge myself or to create any energetic experience about it, but to instead forgive myself and to give to myself a in breathe and an out breath and a re-birth in the moment and to continue walking as that which is best for all life.

I commit myself to when and as I see/find myself within the mind to instead of thinking about it and what I just did, to Breathe.

Day 136 – Living Commitments – Day 8 of 21 – Conversations with myself.

This is a continuation of Day 135 Day 7 of 21.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to generate positive and or negative experiences within myself through internal conversations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Justify the world and how Life currently is as Abuse of life within internal conversations with myself – where there is no real feedback but only me always winning and being right, never allowing myself to actually face reality and taking self responsibility for and as the physical as Who I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to gossip and judge others within my mind within internal conversations so that I may always feel better/good about myself, not seeing the evil I am doing onto others and myself as there is never any feedback that is real, but only me talking to myself as multiple characters that I designed in childhood to always only fight for me and win, even when it is at the cost of LIFE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Glorify myself within my mind through having internal conversations with myself where I will only praise myself and make myself feel good through constantly Re-playing conversations from the past in my mind of memories in different/modified ways to create the energetic experience I seek that I have identified myself with and as being alive – not seeing and realizing that this is an outflow from a past memory where I was glorified or made special by those that has gone before me and that I experienced myself a certain way and now I constantly seek this experience through creating conversations with myself in my mind that is similar, creating the past over and over the present, never moving on or seeing what is really here as LIFE as I trap myself within these energetic experiences I seek and create myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that all internal conversations is but past memories that I have connected with certain energetic experiences that I have liked or hated, and when and as the conversations start within my mind where I re-create the experiences I am simply reliving the past and trapping myself within the past and to within this Identify myself as these past experiences – never realizing myself as the physical.

I commit myself to when and as I see/find myself within talking to myself or having internal conversations with myself, to stop and to ask myself, why am I doing this?, what si the energetic experience I am feeding/creating and why? And to within that realize that it is completely useless and not necessary as I am here breathing and able to move myself physically in breathe and to write and self forgive myself for trapping myself within such conversations that I have with myself and to re-birth myself as LIFE and to not continue on as the past as memories and experiences that just keep repeating and repeating, realizing that this is how the world is in the state it is now, from the past always being re-lived/created in the present and people trapping themselves within the mind as these conversations within the belief that they carry meaning just because they have some sort of energy experience.

Day 135 – Living Commitments – Day 7 of 21 – conversations with myself.

Day 7 of 21 – conversations with myself - It is a trans – it takes over without me even knowing it, when I realize it is to late – I am talking to myself in my head about really weird stuff – how a movie should have ended, what I would have done instead of... such random distractions within the mind. Literally the conversations of multiple characters, each character consist out of one opinion and each opinion has to have their say – yet it is only me talking to myself. Keeping me pre-occupied within my mind, a personal prison so that I may never see the light of day and what the fuck is really going on in this world.

how did I create such a prison for myself -

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the “interesting” CONversations I have within my mind to such an extend that I actually created multiple characters each with a different opinion and view point, so that they may play a TV show in my mind about basically anything.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that this is a side effect/out-flow of when I was a child, and my parents would tell me to go sit somewhere and be quite, and to within such events where I was Suppressed and handled as being a “problem” for adults for just being here in this world, as I was always asked to sit still and be quite as the Adults are talking, and to within this find an escape within my mind, as a way to not to have to face the reality of things – where I now have created characters from each and every situation where this happened. and then where they talk to each other and give opinions to each other on the matter at hand and to entertain each other.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the Internal conversations I have created was/is a outflow of how I was raised, where as a child I was not allowed to talk back or stand up to my parents within their actions, or I would be smacked or yelled at, and through this I have created characters as my parents as voices in my head, where I now can within my mind talk back to them and say what I wanted to say just to give myself a sense of release from the anger/powerlessness I experienced as not having any free speech, and within and through this, I have created multiple characters for all characters in my physical reality within my mind where I entertain myself with these characters and say to them what I wanted to say, where I always WIN and feel good about it, seeking the opposite experience of what I actually experienced when it happened, and through this Never taking self responsibility for this reality as I always belief/believed I solved the problems in my head because I felt better, yet nothing substantial or physical ever changed and so the sins of the fathers continue of a society of oppression and suppression and where mental instability is created within the child and and does create mental disorders that has physical outbreaks and that is harming life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to question why/how I have created and accepted and allowed internal conversations as normal, realizing as I have never questioned this I have never seen the actual problem and thus only continued living the lie, where I “make Belief” in my mind that I am solving problems within having conversations with myself, yet physically not living anything, as I know that the conversations in my head is always only about me winning and me being right and thus not valid within the actual solution to actually talk about the points. Thus I realize the solution is to stop the internal conversations and to Breathe and to bring myself back to the physical reality with actual real physical communication to that I can see the actual real solutions as Myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to drift off into my mind into the secret internal conversations I have with myself. without even noticing myself slipping into the mind, only to discover myself in deep conversations with myself, where I - as a character talk to myself as another character so that I may always WIN, realizing that I have created this within myself because I know that if and when I have to physically communicate such points with others I will not always win and feel good, because I will receive actual real feed back – thus I see and realize that I have connected actual real physical feedback as a point to avoid/fear as I always only got punished in the past as a child, for speaking up or simply being a child making noise as a expression of sound and that it was made to be BAD and an annoyance and a interference with the adults life’s, and that I must instead keep my sounds/questions/common sense and conversations in my mind - where I am save and wont be abused, realizing that this also gave the perfect environment for evil to grow in secret as the conversations was only heard by me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the internal conversations/thoughts/secret-mind is an outflow of the parenting and the education and the environment that a child is brought up in, as it is not within support of life where all life is equal but within a society where the mind as Beliefs/opinions/ideas/judgments as the tree of Good and Evil rules over the physical as the tree of LIFE, and thus only create And manifest children through physical programming such as abuse/shouting/hitting and completely molding a child into a certain way the parents have of life. as their religions/cultures/beliefs/ideas/opinions etc - and to thus live in the mind. As reality was/is constricted by those that has gone before and thus limited and enslavement to the sins of the fathers.

To Be Continued...

Day 134 – Living Commitments – Day 6 of 21. – All I ever known.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that all I have ever known as who I am was/is thoughts/feelings/emotions and that to birth myself as breathe as the physical as that which is real is a physical act in self awareness actually breathing willingly and to stop the thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make having thoughts as normal and thus when and as I am lost or within thoughts, I do not recognize it - as I have already judged it as Normal and thus simply accepting and allowing it to consume me and my day, as self compromise and sabotage.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be consumed by thoughts through accepting and allowing thoughts as being normal and that it is “just” happening to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify the thoughts that is within me through telling myself it is Normal and part of human nature to have thoughts, realizing that as a child I did not have thoughts and that this is the evidence that the natural state of the human/physical is without thoughts, thus thoughts is but a indicator that there is something wrong and not directed within oneself, such as past memories/experiences that one has accepted and allowed to have influence on the present – as this is able to be so through a lack of education of how everything functions in life and that self responsibility has not been taken for all that is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in thoughts as just one of those things that I do every day as if it is normal, realizing that through this I am accepting and allowing the past to be in the present re-creating the past constantly and thus form abusive patterns towards myself and life, realizing that taking self responsibility through stopping the thoughts as the past re-occurring I am taking self responsibility for the present as the future as that which is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Follow thoughts due to me being so used to it, as I see and realize as a child I was never taught what thoughts are and how to direct them I instead out of curiosity followed them, leading to abusive patterns and events/situations that only compromised me and still does the same out of a habit of it is Normal as I have always done it this way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider stopping thoughts and to instead only follow them or to be directed by them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as thoughts come up see them as valuable and that they must have purpose and meaning, and therefore I must follow them, realizing that the purpose and meaning within the thoughts is but only me that has forgotten the past and thus in curiosity wanting to follow the thoughts to relive the past to see that I have not missed anything, realizing that I do this every day, day after day only re-creating the past as I forget the past through the thoughts/feelings/emotions that comes up within me, realizing that I must stop and Breathe as breath is the present in all ways, each breath is new and here as the physical as that which is best for all life to create a future that is best for all and not the past repeating and accumulating in the present.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that the next thought I will have might be important and thus I must participate within all thoughts just not to miss that one thought that might be important.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that all thoughts is of the past and thus not real, but an energy experience trapped in the past re-occurring in the present as I have not taken self responsibility for and as my past yes to take self responsibility for my present and thus the future.

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am automated within thoughts, to stop and breathe and to bring myself back here to breathe and to slow down and move myself as the director in the present.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself justifying and believing that the thoughts I am having right now must have some importance, to stop and realize they are only thoughts of the past and that it is nothing new, ever, and only creating the past in the present, and thus to stop and breathe and be here as the breath as that which is best for all life, as I realize it is not best for all life or myself to constantly re-creating the past, as the past is evident to have only led thus far to a world that is even more fucked up.

Featured post

Day 652 – No one gives a fuck when you die

You have no idea what happens after death, and you are incapable of bridging that gap, because what happens after death is so much more...