Day 282 – Doubt Part 7 – a doubtful world.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I grew up in a world of doubt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that the world live in now and that feeds me and gives me shelter is all possible because of money, and that money can always be taken away from me in a single moment, seeing and realizing that I have been aware of this as a child as I observed and seen how those that has gone before me behave living their lives within money, the fights, the arguments and the things I heard which was always fear and stressful and in doubt of the life I was given.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept and allow a world where my next meal is always in doubt as it depends on if I have money or not which depends on the system and what’s happening with the entire system at any given moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I grew up knowing that there are children out there that has no food/parents or hoe and that I could easily be them at any time if what I have was taken away from me, which creates fear of my entire life in general which is living in doubt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I have developed self doubt from the reality of what I grew up in, that I was brought into a world and raised in a world where I can either have a good life or be abused either way as the system I had to accept as normal was based on hope.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not se and realize that I am not living in a world where my life is certain and definite and that it all depends on money which is always fragile and in doubt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to be confident within the current way the world is and that it will provide for me while billions around me on my one and the same planet are dying of hunger/disease/murder/rape/war/famine that is all human created through and by the very same system feeding me with money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that if I do not have confidence within myself within the current world and the way of life we are all accepting and allowing as normal that there must be something wrong with me, not seeing and realizing that the doubt I have within the current world system is in fact me having confidence within myself that the current way of life is not normal and MUST change and cannot be trusted at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize the confidence in me to doubt the current system and to from that perspective question it and my life and what is being accepted as normal to not accept it and to see what is here and to bring it all to a stop and change to life and be and do what is best for all life in all ways.

Day 281 – Self Doubt Part 6.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself when and as I say something of common sense and other people disagree.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself when and as those that disagree are Many and I am but one.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lose confidence within myself when and as there are disagreement within my world from the many.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place confidence within the many as if they somehow always know better and that I know less and not what I speak of.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a false sense of confidence in the many as a way to not to have to take self responsibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not doubt the many/society as a way of questioning the many/society and the confidence I place in society as always having the right way and knowing what they are doing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself just because there are many speaking up and against what I say as if that must be enough evidence that I am wrong and must doubt myself, not seeing and realizing that this must give me more confidence as I am saying the right things that forces people to also question reality and what they are accepting and allowing to exist here as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place self value in the doubts I have, instead of seeing and realizing that the doubt I have is red flags for me to look at myself and to correct myself and breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that common sense and what is best for all life requires confidence to speak about.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and as something is in fact best for all life and within common sense that no confidence or doubt is required to speak it as it is fact and real and that only/,mostly lies and deception requires to be conned as having confidence to speak about and that it requires doubt as the polarity to work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that self doubt comes in when and as I am not standing within myself as who I am in fact as the words I speak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and as I am speaking and doing something for others that I will always have doubt as it is done from the starting point of self interest and not best for all life which is where I say what is real straight forward and to the point with no need to impress or CONvince others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that only because we have created a world of deception and abuse is something such as confidence required to sell the deception and abuse and thus there will always be doubt in dishonest living till we change this world/ourselves to a place that is best for all lie where no one need to have to develop confidence as no one will have doubt as we will live in a world of certainty and loving thy neighbor as thy self.

Day 280 – Self Doubt Part 5, Doubt as Support


DO U BT
I just now faced a really weird point – I said something, I made a video a long time ago about animals being shot on farms for the sake of reducing “profit loss’ on farms, where I say that the farmers are losing profit but the animals are losing everything from the farmer being there in the name of profit, the animals loses his food, his home, his Life and his everything and literally just survive till death and have to take food from the farmer, where else?? Nothing is left for them, and now they are suddenly called thief's and stealing!! Seriously, animals don’t know there is such a things as stealing, the earth has always before given to them and provided unconditionally till the human came and now call it stealing and then kill the animal for it, because it has a profit/money loss.

And now after all the common sense and looking at the reality of it, I can see it is a pretty awesome point I opened up, and then everyone that comments on the video disagree with me and keeps telling me I am stupid and small and know nothing and can’t see the bigger picture etc etc.

Then there comes this sudden moment of self doubt, doubting that what I have said might be wring and that they might be right, then I take a deep breath and realize WHAT THE FUCK, of course I am making common sense, fucking look at it, it undeniable.

Yes there is that moment of doubt that I must look at WHY, the justification of why I am giving in and not standing in absolute certainty.

I find it interesting that all the peoples comments push that exact point where they ask me for the proof and the evidence and the numbers and the calculations that farming is fucking up wildlife and pushing animals to extinction – so here I am with common sense where I see directly the reality and they can’t see the obvious connections - as if something greater and higher is maybe instead killing the animals and that farming as we are doing now is completely harmless and not having any consequences.

So now I face the doubt, why us the doubt there, I see this doubt is because I am one standing in the face of the many voices saying the same thing. So it is on the believe that if many people say the same thing then it must be the truth and thus I must be wrong, because the many seem to see the same thing and I don’t, I see it differently, so I must doubt myself.

Yet I can see through this, because I understand how the mind fucks with me, Know thy self, I see it is in reverse, it is to stand no matter what with the common sense and the self honesty as Life, Life’s got my back and I have Life’s back, we are the same back, so I may be one human physical body speaking but I have life behind me, they might be a group but they are speaking against that which gives them life and breathe, it is obviously not recommended.

So i am learning to stand and to breathe and to not cave in just because others are saying differently, just because the group disagree does not mean they are right and I am wrong, if and when I see and realize that I stand within certainty within myself within what I stand as, as the physical reality as life as actuality then There is never any reason to doubt myself, my doubt is showing me where I still have to work on myself and to stand, to breathe and not be directed by doubt, but common sense and self honesty and what is best for all life is/must always be what I move myself as.

So I see and realize that before I speak and open up a point for all, that I must write about it to have clarity to create my confidence and to not have any assumptions or hopes within the vlogs/blogs and to be here as all I speak as being absolute in each word, this can only be done through researching and writing and integrating the information as me to live it as me and to share it equally with all to awareness as I made myself aware in oneness and equality where I bring the points to physical reality within common sense as being obvious, so that I can say what needs to be said in simplicity and clarity and not speak in circles and create self doubt.

I create myself in each moment/actions/decision.

Day 279 – Self Doubt Part 4

Day 277 - Self Doubt Part 2
Day 278 - Self Doubt Part 3

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Doubt myself according to the input given to me from others, instead of seeing and realizing that the input from others is support for me to see where I can correct myself instead.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that self doubt is always about me and not what others say/think/judge about me, thus seeing and realizing that it is that I must know who I am and within that stand and walk.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that other people are responsible for me doubting myself/

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let others people determine for me who I am and to this doubt myself as I give away myself responsibility of deciding for myself who I am and thus what I can do or not.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Doubt myself as being capable of directing others as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Doubt myself as being capable of learning new vocabulary.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have confidence within myself as being capable of learning new vocabulary through holding past experiences against myself where I struggled and failed, instead of seeing and realizing that it was a point of reference for me to work on and to learn from.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself within learning new words and to effectively integrate them as me and living them as who I am due to past experiences where I failed and judged myself as not being capable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not being able to learn new vocabulary with full understanding of the words,

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if and when I fail to learn new vocabulary that it means I must doubt myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I fail to learn new vocabulary effectively the first time that it must mean that I cannot have confidence within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that something must be wrong with me if I cannot learn new vocabulary the first time and thus I must not ever show or have confidence within myself that I can or I will just disappoint myself and experience the bad experience again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear experiencing self doubt and to within this avoid being confident within myself as to avoid the experience of self doubt.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that to not give self confidence to myself as who I am that I am already just giving self doubt to myself instead the whole time, seeing and realizing that it is a polarity game of enslavement and limitation.

Instead I see and realize that I must stop separating myself from “self confidence” and to live self confidence as who I am and not as a energy experience, as all energy is polarity based and needs positive and negative to move.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek out where I can doubt myself so that I can find the things where I can be confident and to then get a energy high from those points, instead of seeing and realizing that I am within this limiting myself and enslaving myself to the mind as energy movement, instead of moving myself as the physical in each breathe to do what needs to be done as self confident, seeing and realizing that self confidence is a living action of who I am to always do what is best for all life in all ways.

To be continued.

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