Day 376 – Power Games Part 2

Day 375 - Power Games Part 1

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having power over everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire having power over everyone because then I believe I have the right to be secure with myself and thus have confidence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be secure with myself within myself as who i am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be confident within myself within who I am and thus seeking it through alternative ways such as seeing power over others to control them and to have control and to only then feel secure and then only be confident.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that seeking power over others is a clear indication that I am feeling powerless somewhere within my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not question the actions of myself within seeking power over others.

I forgive myself that have accepted and allowed myself to not investigate my past to see where this game originated from and why/how.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek power over others because of past experiences/memories where others have played power over me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define what power is through past experiences where I felt powerless, and to within this give the definition of power what I have experienced from others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that, in past events where I was over powered by others either through mental points such as knowledge and information or physically such in sports or in fight/bullying to have through those events create fears/insecurities that now led up to me seeking power over others in the event of not having to experience those past experiences again.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear other people having power over me due to their status in society.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear other people over powering me simply because of their Ego resonance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give permission within myself for others to overpower me within almost anything simply because I have secret thoughts/back-chat within me about myself all the time, that is dis-empowering towards myself giving anyone the upper hand over me at any time. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that being over powered by others starts first within myself, with my relationship that I have towards myself, within how much self-respect and honor I have, and when and as I am participating within back chat and secret thoughts, I am giving away my self-respect and my honor as I am living in deceit and thus dis honor and dis-respect, and through this behavior I am creating myself as less then within my mind only, and so I actually live as if I am less than others, and through this I am giving others permission to want to overpower me.

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am attempting to play the game of power, to stop and to breathe and to not participate, within the realization that there is no power game unless I participate within such a game, as it takes two to make a game a game and to have meaning and value.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make the starting point of not wanting to play in the power game to have power, seeing and realizing that this wanting of power isn’t over others, but instead self-empowerment, where I stand stable as my breathing and not within fear as the back chat and secret mind.

I commit myself to clear my starting point of any secret mind starting point that is within self-interest and self-gain, and to change my starting point to that of common sense and self-honesty to what is best for all life. Seeing and realizing that a self-empowered person that has self-respect and honor is a person that is stable and that is best for all life. 

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am in fear of others over powering me, to stop and to breathe and to look at what is it within that moment within me within my secret mind and back chat that is going on that is triggering this fear, and to clear myself through exposing myself to myself and to be self-honest within myself and to then take a deep breath and stop, to then focus on breathing and building my self-discipline as breathe. 

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am seeking confidence or security through dis-empowering someone else only to empower myself, to stop and to realize that this is not what power is as it required abuse and ego, as both or those are indications of actual weakness, and that self-empowerment is to breathe and to NOT have any secret thoughts or back chat but to stick to the physical and what is real, to prevent nay abuse, as that is real power, to not go there where abuse exist, but to stand by oneself as breath as the physical and to trust self, to honor self and respect self.

Day 375 - Power Games Part 1

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make life a game of power, to see who's got the most power and who is the weakest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being seen as weak, or the weakest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear others having power over me and that I have lost the game, and thus as I am a loser I must obey or submit to the winner, or become their friend and be in their good books, in order to make up for the loss. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make life about gaining power over others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I do not have power over others that I am weak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel insecure and less than others if I do not have some form of power over them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I do not have power over others that they have power over me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if someone has power over me, that I must fear them. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the idea of someone having power over me and that they can somehow mind control me or make me feel bad about myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the idea that someone has power over me from having certain abilities that I don’t and that they can use it against me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compete with everyone in my world to see who’s got power over who, and within this establish a self-definition of myself, that is either of superiority or inferiority.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize how I am creating all my fear within my world through competing with everyone to see who’s got power over who, as I see and realize that when and as I do this, that I am creating points of fear that isn’t really there, and can only exist because I am playing this game.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek power over others to feel secure, seeing and realizing that I only do this because I feel insecure about myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and as I seek power over others, in any form that I can find power within, if it is physical or mental or metaphysical, I am creating points of fear within myself and my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and as I play the game of seeking power over others, that I will find people that I can over power and that this will create a point of submission within me and my world and thus give complete fear/power towards the other persona and thus imprison myself within what this other person thinks about me or see in me or have towards me as I will become self-conscious within this persons presence because I believe now that this person really has power over me simply because my game did not work out, which is all bullshit and only mental delusion.

Day 137 – Living Commitments – Day 9 of 21. – raised to Trust the Mind

Day 137 – Living Commitments – Day 9 of 21. – raised to Trust the Mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a failure when and as I find myself not breathing but instead thinking and participating within the mind.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to instead of judging myself as a failure to instead immediately as the correction breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to instead of realizing the mistake and to correct myself immediately effectively to judge myself and to within the judgment go into the back chat of - it is now to late I have already fallen” and to within this give the mind permission to continue and fucking with my day, realizing that I am the creator of this and thus in a single breathe I can stop and stop fucking with myself and Forgive myself and move on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into feeling hopelessness when I find myself within the mind thinking and talking to myself, within the belief that I will never be able to stop the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give the experience of feeling hopelessness power and validation through not breathing and to participate within it, realizing that this is how I am creating it and manifesting it and that it takes a single breath at a time and stop.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that I am a victim to all experiences I have of the mind that has physical impact on the body, realizing that I can stop through breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make myself subject to any or all experiences I have of and as the mind that has physical manifestations in my body as my body such as moods, feeling drained of energy, tiredness, headaches and more. And to belief that as I am experiencing the physical effects of the mind on the body I am to late and breath cannot save me, realizing that it is exactly what will help, simply breathing and being here and stopping the mind feeding the systems that had physical outflows on the body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget the simplicity of the solutions to stopping the mind as breathe – realizing that I have not yet realized breathe as myself and that I also have not yet fully grasp/understand the mind and what and how the mind functions and the consequential outflows of the mind on the body, thus I allow and accept the mind to run wild and free as a form of Trust.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to TRUST the mind and whatever the mind throws at me and whatever the body is experiencing as the mind,.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I have in space and time placed all my trust in the mind and not the breathe as life, thus I will as a “natural” thing turn to the mind in trust, instead of breathe as that which in fact gives me life as the breathe, not seeing and realizing that the trust I place in my MIND that I have developed through many Blind years as to not having any understanding of what and how the mind functions, thus the trust is blind, even if the mind led me off cliffs and into fires, as it was all I knew.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Trust something simply because It is all I know as having the knowledge and information as it, but not in fact how it works and what it is in fact, thus the knowing isn’t really knowing but only a matter of being used to it, even if I have to follow it to the end of the world because it is all I built my trust on, a trust that is based in fear and self interest as the cause and the effect of the current world we life in as the living hell for all in the debts of money.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I have placed all my trust in the mind yet I do not even understand the mind or how it works and manifests in this reality and yet I belief it and everything it throws at me, seeing and realizing that I must re-evaluate my trust within myself as Breathe where I decide and direct and not some thoughts or form of back chatting and having conversations with myself or even where feelings or emotions make decisions for me, this is not acceptable as it is in fact not trust worthy at all as I am not the one directing and moving myself but being directed and moved by the mind.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself predicating in the mind as thoughts or even where I have followed them a bit to not judge myself or to create any energetic experience about it, but to instead forgive myself and to give to myself a in breathe and an out breath and a re-birth in the moment and to continue walking as that which is best for all life.

I commit myself to when and as I see/find myself within the mind to instead of thinking about it and what I just did, to Breathe.