Focus, Silence and Interruptions – inner eruption

 

Silence, focus, sudden noise, interruptions, inner eruptions take place, reactions flow over, shouting, screaming, controlling, dominating, then quite, silence and focus.  

A For self awareness I suggest starting this series of interviews here
Click on the name - Self Awareness steps for the Elite - Introduction

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I cannot focus when I do not have silence within my environment. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself to the rule of that I can only focus when I have silence within my environment. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be distracted by sound/noise within my environment when and as I am busy with something particular that requires my focus. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from FOCUS and to thus make focus a thing out there that I must obtain and so within this create certain rules and setups where I believe only once those specific rules and setups are in place, such as silence, that only then I can focus, and thus within this imply that I am never focussed or the directive principle within my every breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that focus is something I must practice and so I seek and want to obtain the right environments where there is NO distractions for me to train and practice my focus within what I am doing, and thus within this rule I have made for myself I will always fail as noise will always be here and not seeing and realizing that practicing my focus within specific conditions limits my focus to those specific conditions and thus the practice will never leave those specific conditions unless I drop all conditions and walk focus as me in each and every breathe and to stop the distractions within me as the thoughts/feelings/emotions that arise within me when I feel someone else is fucking with my focus by making noise/sounds.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as someone within my reality comes to me to get my attention while I am busy with something I need to focus on, to lose focus almost immediately and to within this access anger and frustration and so within this act out the anger and frustration where I now attempt to control my reality through my sound and behaviour to get control of my environment to once again have focus and to focus on what I am doing.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that focus is ME as breath in each and every breath and thus no matter what comes within my reality, that according to the mind as energy should trigger me and or distract me, to remain focussed on the breathing, not necessarily on what I am doing, as what I am doing mustn’t determine who I am, and so I see and realize that as long as any energy moves within me and not me as Breathe clear and here, then I am already not focussed and only deluding myself in the silence I believe helps me focus which is a mind focus, focussing energy which can always be disturbed and thus have a short fuse.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate focus from Breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate discipline from breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate self-responsibility from breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate flexibility from breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate Care from breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate ME from breath.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Breath is here as each and every breath is all that is here as everything that is here and thus to not breathe is to walk in conflict with what is here as reality, where the mind is finding ways to be within a polarity.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to fully embrace breath as the solution and to from within and as breath walk HERE as life and to direct me as breath in each and every given moment as breath and not to accept and allow the mind to direct me here into polarities as thoughts, feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek silence outside of me, when breath is silence within and as me and thus nothing outside of me can change anything within me, as there must be nothing with me but breath/life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate focus as the word focus from and as me as my breath, and within so doing seek focus outwards, and so always running after focus and moments and specific setups/environments never finding focus or silence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my environment for me not being able to focus, and thus not see and realize that the blame that come up is due to how I am experiencing myself within the moment of feeling disturbed which is anger, frustration and thus it is within me that the disturbance is taking place and that is what needs to be changed.  

On Blame, check it out here -> Blame: The Hidden Nature

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I feel someone isn’t considering me and or my environment when and as I want to focus to get upset and angry and to within a second, without notice, tone my voice and shut down any disturbances using my reality and circumstances as a reason and excuse for why and how I can act out my frustration or anger that I experience within me and to then have what I see as control of my environment as to control what I experience within me.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that as long as I act out my anger and frustration to have silence to be able to focus, and through this control my environment that I will in return create an angry and frustrated environment/people as they will pick up on what I am experiencing through my behaviour and voice, thus I see and realize that I must clear and fully take responsibility for any and all experiences within me till nothing moves within me and to commit myself to NOT speak or say anything as long as there is an energy within me and to focus on ME as breath here first and foremost, even if this means NEVER saying anything again, as it will or might not ever be necessary when I have taken and realized my creation of me as this point and thus focus is me and silence is me as Breathe and no blame or anger or frustration can exist.

To learn more on Feelings, emotions and thoughts I suggest starting this series on the Atlanteans -  

 Click here to start - > Atlanteans - The Beginning - Part 1

Day 557 - Deepak Chopra and Imagination

I do not know if it is appropriate for me to Debunk someone such as Deepak Chopra that has been on the scene of “spiritual people” for many many years and has helped many people I am sure of it, but I am also sure that the solutions are only temporary and not permanent, if they were then Deepak would have had less Clients, he is a great salesmen, he sure did his homework well and practiced his work in a way that targets the right people, people that are serious about changing themselves and for example their destructive natures, but unfortunately Deepak Chopra still doesn’t understand the most basic and simple aspects of life, and this is revealed in his words, I am referring to his simple words that is placed in quotes and send all around the internet to get people’s attention . What are these simple and basic aspects of Life I am talking about? Well it is common sense and self-honesty. 

But for today I am only going to take on Deepak Chopra in my blog on the following quote (also the picture used in this Blog) quote: “the best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety” – end of quote

So what Did Deepak do here? Did he really just say something profound and that is amazing? No, he simply mentioned two polarities of the same construct, what is the construct? Well the energy of and from the MIND – as in this case Imagination. Yes sure to almost all people on earth this is “normal” to have polarities and to rather take part on/live the positive part of the energies to apparently create something positive. But here comes the part most people do not know or understand as to why this isn’t a solution and in fact enhancing the problems people are facing.

See Deepak in this quote is attempting to help people get over anxiety, but what he does not understand is that anxiety is energy of the mind, just like creative energy of the imagination, both are the exact energy just placed in a different light, and the point here is, the mind is the problem first and foremost. The mind is meant to be stopped, so that we can reach our beingness and true expressions. But as long as we are contaminating ourselves with the influences of the mind as positive and negative, we will always be stuck in polarities, moving from one side of being positive to negative, and as we all know, negativity usually wins, that is why we are always seeking out the positive.

So if we had to live what Deepak Chopra is suggesting, using our imagination for creative thoughts or imaginings to not go into anxiety or stress or fear – we are not dealing with the fear/stress/anxiety – in fact we are suppressing it and accumulating more and more while being unaware and being blinded by positive pictures and thoughts running through our minds, so this creative imagination will only last a while and then we will experience all the negative shit again, and actually as if it got more.

Another point to consider and that you can cross reference for yourself is, when you are in a “positive” state or attempting to only imagine creativity and good things, ANYTHING in your day will quickly put you down into a negative, may it be someone looking at you wrong, because when you are attempting to be so creative and positive in a world that is clearly in a state of doom, you are attempting to be more than reality, not being real with yourself, and thus a person/you can become very reactive and these reactions can either go internal or external , some get depressed and some get really angry for example.

Now to go one more step further – what is another point that is completely missed with Deepak Chopra – he tells you that for example “the worse use of imagination is anxiety” but he does not explain in detail what is anxiety, how do we create anxiety, when anxiety comes up what is it indicating, how can we take anxiety in any given moment and instead of resisting it or fighting it or going into the “positive” instead but that we can rather take our power as creators and we can take responsibility for our creation as the anxiety within us and understand our creation – for example anxiety is the indication that you are about to follow the same pattern that isn’t best for you or where you always fall or haven’t yet established who you are within your reality within certain situations and that you haven’t investigated and taken the time to check all your patterns and why you are repeating them over and over again and not changing, what is the ENERGY inside the anxiety that we seek through repeating patterns over and over without changing ourselves, how do we change ourselves etc. I am not going to give all the answers here; I am simply opening up the points to each one reading this to check for yourself.

Imagination is anxiety, no matter if we are doing it positively or negatively, the mind always seeks to enslave a person to energy to keep us trapped in the mind as imagination, never to stand up and realEYES ourselves as LIFE one and equal, that we were born perfect beings without the need of imagination but to simply participate here direct as ourselves as our creative natures and to develop upon them.

Finishing off: You are Born into this world as a child, you had no imagination, you had no mind, you had no thoughts, you had no memories, you had nothing inside your head, yet, just look at a baby/toddler/child – the pure expressions, the living, the energy of the physical body, the beingness, no fear, the pure expressions – you can’t remember your first three years because you weren’t contaminated yet with the “mind” as consciousness, yet you expressed, you lived. You were more alive than now – so ask yourself, how did I get here?

There is a very long and hard process for everyone in this world – the Process of Rebirth. And Desteni is the only group of people in this world that has actually taken the time to really investigate everything and to come to real solutions, how to end addiction, fears, destructive patterns/behaviors and how to become the creator of your life and to rebirth yourself as LIFE in fact.

If you are reading this and you are serious, if you could see the common sense and be self-honest with yourself about what I wrote. Then the next level is here for you.

Investigate Desteni I Process <-- CLICK link

Day 498 – slowing down – the way of the turtle

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider slowing down during my day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wake up in the morning with a rush inside of me, a rush in the fear of not getting to everything that I need to do, or believe I need to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use energy to manipulate myself into movement to get to everything that I need to do, or believe that I need to do.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that I use energy to create a rush within me to manipulate me to move myself to get things done, seeing and realizing that this manipulation that is driven by fear is a form of resistance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see and realize that when I am within energy that is of fear/anxiety/stress that I am using these energies to manipulate me into moving and doing what I need to do.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the reason for this energy manipulation is because I have a resistance to what I need to do, and thus I use force such as fear to rush me to do it, NOT seeing and realizing that the rush within me to move me is showing me a point where I haven’t corrected my relationship towards something within my reality within me, the nature of the relationship.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush myself within all the points in my reality where I have established a relationship within me of a “need to do it” – and thus the relationship is against me and what I want to do, and so create friction, where I have made it about what I do instead of who I am within what I do, thus using energy as a force to force me to do it, creating a rush, so that I can rush through it and just get it over with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Keep myself within this rush mode, never slowing down to actually have time, or a moment to check myself, who I am within the moment and why I am experiencing myself the way I am in each breath and to re align it, to change my relationships in my reality within me.

I thus forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that within slowing down I am able to actually see what is here within using breathing as a grounding tool/earthing myself, where I can slow everything down and catch the thoughts and energies that is directing me, and to take direction/authority of me and change my relationship within myself within/towards what I am doing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear slowing down will make me lose time and not get to everything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect slowing down within and without in my reality that I will not be productive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect negative opinions/believes/ideas to slowing down and being slow within my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I slow down I will be late for something,, seeing and realizing that this is an irrational fear as all fear is irrational, as slowing down within me can be present at all times, even if I am running, and that is the point of slowing down I need to focus on, and to not miss inform myself based on ideas/opinions/believes but to remain practical in a living manner, but to always check that I am quit within me and still like water.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Fear facing myself when moving slow as who I am within all relationships within me and thus my reality, as I know moving slow will give me time to see and to get real and make real changes that are being avoided within myself and outside of myself by moving fast within me and thus outside of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to run away from myself and my reality by living fast, I commit myself to always check myself and to slow down and take a breath and keep breathing, to take a slow phase within me and to stop the abusive patterns that isn’t best for me or for all, and to change these patterns by bringing my awareness to them and to be direct with myself.

Day 224 – The Apocalypse Battle of who is right and who is Wrong 21/12/12

I remember how I used to fight with my friends way back in 2006 about the world ending in 2012, I even made bets with them that they will be wrong and that the world will end, I had all these theories that made so much sense, I had evidence that back me up on the internet – such as videos and experts giving photos of stuff and math’s and reasoning.

I had no reason to doubt myself and that I was right, I felt anxious and fearful for my friends that they can be so ignorant and not see what I am saying, because someone else is saying it as well and there is proof, I used to talk to my friends about how the world will end in 2012.12.01 I had so many stories that I told them, they were mixed up but I somehow made sense of it all and put it together how I saw with reason in my mind how it will be possible.

It all started with Reptilians, my dad used to share with me information he red about reptilians and how the reptilians created man and how we were used for collecting gold so that the reptilians can fix their planet, something about the atmosphere and that their planet comes by every 3600 years, as they are on a different orbit.

I immediately felt inferior as I saw these massive reptile species that created us, they must have awesome technology to do what they did, I was I was also told that their planet that will pass again soon will have devastating effects on earth, even kill everything on earth as their planets magnetic field will pull our planet, and there was the theory that the reptilians will come back and kill out billions of people and take the planet for themselves and enslave the rest of the human race for their own purposes.

There was also the theory that the reptilians (aliens) will come and take some humans with them on their planet, and on this planet humans can grow older and live longer and explore space and do awesome stuff, but then there was also the theory that other alien races will come and save a view of the human race from the reptilians and these few chosen people must be “enlightened” only, be worthy.

Then there was the spiritual side to all of this – that the world will not just end in 2012-12-21 but that there will be a portal that will open or a dimensional shift happening on earth, and only the enlightened or people with high vibrations will be saved as these people will be able to go through to the next dimensional level while those that cant will simply die with the earth.

There was also Jesus and that he might come, and that the stuff in the Bible will come to life and only 144 000 people will be chosen to live while even the dead will rise to burn in hell or go to heaven, and that Satan and Jesus will fight in the skies with their demons and angels in the biggest battle earth has ever seen, and then Jesus/god will slain the devil and send him to hell, and that of course I have to be a good person to be one of the chosen ones to live.

Then there was the other one, the world will go into another Ice age and the poles will shift and Billions of people will die due to this as extremely low temperatures will occur everywhere on earth suddenly that will freeze the air immediately and kill anything that breathes, and that in this shift on those that have been smart enough to know how to survive will survive.

I was filled up with fear, I started preparing myself mentally and physically in my reality for any and all of these options that the world can end.

I started crating myself as the survivor character, I was spiritual, I was physically strong and ready, I was in a higher vibration, I knew how to apparently fight massive reptilian aliens and I red books on how to survive in the wild and how to make fire – I got knives and back packs and cross bows, I mentally pumped myself up, I was checking what foods I will store up for myself I started taking to my friends and they laughed, I went more into it all just to have that odd chance of telling them I told you so.

I started applying meditation, I applied for karate classes, I red up on aliens and spaceships, I watched a lot of videos on the internet to check how far is nibiru, how is global warming doing and what’s happening to the ice in the world. I really started obsessing with everything, all in the name of fear of death.
It became a game.

To be Continued.