Day 152 - Fear of Living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being here in breathe where there is no mind that controls my every movement, instead of me living in and as my movement in awareness of me here as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect living to an energetic experience of either good or bad, not seeing and realizing that as long as I rely on being alive to be based on a feeling then I can never live as the feelings/emotions is always dependent on the input. And thus I see and realize that I am LIFE and thus always Life and that the fear of living is me holding me back as LIFE as the mind as thoughts feeling and emotions that puts limits on Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I move and direct my day to do so dependent on how I feel, and that I will only enjoy my day if I feel alive, instead of realizing I am LIFE and thus as LIFE I am here living as the physical and thus feelings and emotions and thoughts are but limiting me from expressing myself in each moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to control all my movements in my
Daily participation with thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself through controlling all my life thought thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am here and that waiting for a feeling or an emotion to make me feel alive is me only hiding in fear of living here and seeing what is actually here as me as Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to HOLD myself back within life as LIFE through the thoughts/feelings/emotions I participate within that only controls my behavior
according to fear and survival of the ego.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive my expression must always be BIG and wonderful and remember able.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect being alive to a energetic experience that feels BIG and that take over my body, not seeing and realizing that I am in fact only limiting myself to that experience to be able to feel alive and thus enslave myself to a lifelong search to feel alive for this energetic experience and thus never living here as the breathe that is always here as LIFE and not subject or limited to any or only one thing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the thoughts/feeling/emotions that control my everyday movements and behaviors in the name of survival and to actually live here as the breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the mind control as the thoughts/feelings/emotions where my mind controls my body in complete limitation and enslavement to energy and to fear who I will be without the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown, where I let go of knowing as the three of knowledge of good and evil, and where I decide t eat from the tree of life that is neither good not evil but only what is best for all life in all ways and thus not knowledge or information needed to LIVE but to simply LIVE as LIFE one and Equal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and aso I am within the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions that I am actually literally mind control myself as the body and thus not living but controlling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the control I have limited myself to as a belief of what life is and to actually live here in each breathe that is unknown yet known.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive means I must be doing something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive I just do out of the ordinary things, not seeing and realizing that through such a belief I am only validating the belief that I am not alive when I am not doing something out of the ordinary.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make living difficult for myself through placing being alive outside of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make living a feeling and thus to within this always being in search of life instead of seeing and realizing that I am literally already LIFE as the physical and thus I am here alive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to harm life as I seek to be alive outside of myself as separate from life here through taking what is here and to turn it all into a energy experience at any cost.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that within the belief of I must feel alive to be alive I am actually only contradicting myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when and as I place being alive in a feeling/emotion that I am actually telling myself I am a zombie walking around in search of/and feasting of LIFE and devouring LIFE to feed myself just to feel alive, and thus create a system that is no different such as capitalism where the system keeps on feeding on earth just to keep it alive even at the cost of earth (life).

I commit myself to when and as I see myself seeking to be alive, to stop and breathe and realize I am here already LIFE in and as the physical as plain simple common sense can show me in all ways possible and that seeking to be alive is a symptom of brainwashing and mind control that has been deliberately created within the world to make people BUY buy and BUY so that money can be made and so that a very few people can become stinking rich because everyone is in search for LIFE, while it is a search that can never be achieved as long as everyone do not see the obvious and look to self and what is HERE. The perfect scam..