Day 152 - Fear of Living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being here in breathe where there is no mind that controls my every movement, instead of me living in and as my movement in awareness of me here as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect living to an energetic experience of either good or bad, not seeing and realizing that as long as I rely on being alive to be based on a feeling then I can never live as the feelings/emotions is always dependent on the input. And thus I see and realize that I am LIFE and thus always Life and that the fear of living is me holding me back as LIFE as the mind as thoughts feeling and emotions that puts limits on Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I move and direct my day to do so dependent on how I feel, and that I will only enjoy my day if I feel alive, instead of realizing I am LIFE and thus as LIFE I am here living as the physical and thus feelings and emotions and thoughts are but limiting me from expressing myself in each moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to control all my movements in my
Daily participation with thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself through controlling all my life thought thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am here and that waiting for a feeling or an emotion to make me feel alive is me only hiding in fear of living here and seeing what is actually here as me as Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to HOLD myself back within life as LIFE through the thoughts/feelings/emotions I participate within that only controls my behavior
according to fear and survival of the ego.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive my expression must always be BIG and wonderful and remember able.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect being alive to a energetic experience that feels BIG and that take over my body, not seeing and realizing that I am in fact only limiting myself to that experience to be able to feel alive and thus enslave myself to a lifelong search to feel alive for this energetic experience and thus never living here as the breathe that is always here as LIFE and not subject or limited to any or only one thing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the thoughts/feeling/emotions that control my everyday movements and behaviors in the name of survival and to actually live here as the breathe.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the mind control as the thoughts/feelings/emotions where my mind controls my body in complete limitation and enslavement to energy and to fear who I will be without the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown, where I let go of knowing as the three of knowledge of good and evil, and where I decide t eat from the tree of life that is neither good not evil but only what is best for all life in all ways and thus not knowledge or information needed to LIVE but to simply LIVE as LIFE one and Equal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when and aso I am within the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions that I am actually literally mind control myself as the body and thus not living but controlling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of the control I have limited myself to as a belief of what life is and to actually live here in each breathe that is unknown yet known.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive means I must be doing something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that to be alive I just do out of the ordinary things, not seeing and realizing that through such a belief I am only validating the belief that I am not alive when I am not doing something out of the ordinary.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make living difficult for myself through placing being alive outside of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make living a feeling and thus to within this always being in search of life instead of seeing and realizing that I am literally already LIFE as the physical and thus I am here alive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to harm life as I seek to be alive outside of myself as separate from life here through taking what is here and to turn it all into a energy experience at any cost.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that within the belief of I must feel alive to be alive I am actually only contradicting myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when and as I place being alive in a feeling/emotion that I am actually telling myself I am a zombie walking around in search of/and feasting of LIFE and devouring LIFE to feed myself just to feel alive, and thus create a system that is no different such as capitalism where the system keeps on feeding on earth just to keep it alive even at the cost of earth (life).

I commit myself to when and as I see myself seeking to be alive, to stop and breathe and realize I am here already LIFE in and as the physical as plain simple common sense can show me in all ways possible and that seeking to be alive is a symptom of brainwashing and mind control that has been deliberately created within the world to make people BUY buy and BUY so that money can be made and so that a very few people can become stinking rich because everyone is in search for LIFE, while it is a search that can never be achieved as long as everyone do not see the obvious and look to self and what is HERE. The perfect scam..

Day 98 – Moving myself Moving the World Part 4.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I see things that needs to be done within practicality in my world and within what is best for all life to create the thought fo seeing myself doing it and already experiencing myself in the current moment as I project how I belief/judge how I will experience myself and to then create the back chat of – “I do not want to experience myself that way” – “I would rather go watch something or sit outside” – thus seeing and realizing that through participating within the mind as thoughts as energy that I actually create an experience within me of something that still has to come where as in the current moment I have no idea of how I will in fact experience myself, and so I see and realize that to project how I belief/judge how I will experience myself in the future in things to come is me already making it so, setting it is stone for myself while in fact it is just of the mind and not real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself according to my own judgments/beliefs of things and thus I belief according to my judgment that I can only experience myself in that certain way within that event as I judged it, not seeing and realizing that it is my judgment that is making it so, thus I have the power to not judge at all and to instead breathe and to when/if the moment comes I will be here in and as the physical with no self imposed self created experiences of energy that only limits me in all ways, either through being emotional or full of fear and anxiety stress and or the opposites, as both are energy and polarities it is best to not feed one or the other as they require each other to exist as energy and thus breathing as no energy is the solution to real freedom and no self created limitations of the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I participate within thoughts of the the future/past to go into the thoughts and give them validation as if they have the power to determine what I will do and not do, instead of realizing that I create the thoughts and thus I can stop and breathe and remain here one and equal as the physical moving myself as the physical where no energy/mind that is limited to its own information decide for me what I can and can not do but to instead use the physical as the true mind to show me what is here to be done and how within the principal of what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into resistance of moving myself when and as a thought comes up that presents me with a picture of something else I could be doing such as taking a nap or going to the mall or the beach and to then judge what is here to do as that which is best for all life as less than and as something that isnt “fun” to do, thus I realize this is only possible through the process of brainwashing that has happened in child hood years and even still now, where I was programmed and taught that going to the beach or the mall or having a nap is fun and that anything else will thus not be fun and to have connected fun with an energy feeling/emotional connection that I will activate when I have the thought and to posses me and then go into a state of resistance to do what isnt judged as fun. Seeing and realizing that if I simply remove the energy connection that I have towards the fun stuff and remove the energy connection I have created towards the not fun stuff that all that will remain here is me moving myself physically, realizing that this is true freedom as there is no mind/feelings/emotions keeping me limited and only possible to do a few tings, but now as the physical I cna do all things as I am not limited by any thought/feeling/emotion.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge doing what is best for all life as something that I have to do, realizing that as long as I see it as something I have to do. I have not yet dealt with myself and my own self honesty and common sense where I do see that doing what is best for all life is in fact the only way I should ever live and thus it must not be a have to but a way of life as WHO I AM as life, one and equal in all ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for the system and the pictures and colors the system throws at me just like sweets, they look good, they taste good and thus I belief they must be good, till the research is done and we find out that is is actually broccoli that is good and sweets as a man made thing of many chemicals etc mixed together thus not made but mutilated (thus it is man) that causes a lot of shit for the body. And so it is to look at what I have made sweets in my mind within what I belief I like and rather be doing and to see the truth of it and the starting point of it all, and then to re evaluate myself and where I stand and what is really here as the physical in support of the physical reality one and equal as me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when and as I move myself as WHO I AM, that I am in fact as WHO I AM moving the world within everything I do and say in fact as all is connected in all ways.

To be continued.