Day 45 - Reversed Comparison - weird logic.

I have noticed during my day within participating in activities where there are others that there is competition, the competition that I am talking about isn't what you would expect, it is like a secret competition yet visible in reactions/behavior, where each individual is constantly comparing what they are doing with others, but the competition is to see who does the least work, either self or the other.

From my own experience I notice that I will be doing work, I will be busy with my daily task, and I will do what needs to be done to finish it, here comes the big BUT, But when someone else comes along and ask me to help them with something else, or to do something else for them, there is a reaction a EGO - the mind/energy.

I react because I now have to do "more" than what the others are doing due to my own comparisons and back chat in my mind, I will have back chat like, why don't you ask that person, why do I have to do it, why don't you do it yourself, it is so small do you really need my help, and so the EGO will see and try and find any way possible to not have to do this "EXTRA" work and fighting for its own limitation and to keep the physical enslaved as energy so that the physical can not stand up as life as a limitless expression in each breathe to do onto another as you would do onto yourself.

Does this have to do with us all being Rotten children, that we need something to motivate us to do things, do we have to get rewards for doing things and extra rewards for doing more.

It is really limited in all its ways to self - it is mind enslavement.

It is a constant comparison GAME - we each will do what needs to be done but not more, because we look at others, we see what they do and accordingly we become little self righteousness  cunts so to say - we become reactive and judgmental, this isn't fair, this is unfair, why me, whea whea whea, like little babies.

And we all do this, we all believe we are so special and important and that our life's are so busy and already full of things to do, we can not help each other, we can not do something else for someone else, it is so fucking unfair to help someone else, look at what they are doing, look at them being lazy, why aren't you asking them for help, why me, why me, why me.

This is all part of the ROTTEN CHILD SYNDROME - imagine our world exist only out of people with this syndrome. We are in big shit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare what I do to what others are doing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare what I do as being more than what others are doing, and so I create the judgment/believe that what i am doing is already a lot of work in comparison to what others are doing, and so create the unfair point when I am asked for help to do "more work" then others (out of my own created believe) and that it is unfair and so accept and allow my own limitation, realizing that all of this only happened in the mind, when I look at the physical and take the mind and all the comparison and all the back chat out, I see that there is more than enough time to help others and that I have created and manifested my world as to busy through compromise and deliberate in my actions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in a constant "game"of seeing where I can do the least work, realizing that I have created this game as a power play over others as to show them that I am busy and that if I help them that I will want to receive a rewards as I have sacrificed my "important/limited time" to help them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react when someone else asks me for help, realizing within the reaction there is a accepted and allowed limitation, and that I have to be strict with myself to break the accepted and allowed limitation and to move beyond the mind created limitation and do what is asked of me, so that I may realize what is real and what is not and to rebirth myself as that which is real within and as the physical one and equal as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself with others in my environment to see who is doing what and how much so that I can create reactions within me towards other when they ask me for help as to that I am busy "more than others" and that asking me for my time to help them or to do something more is unfair and asking something "BIG"of me and thus I would want a reward for my help, realizing that this is only a clear indication for myself that I have the "rotten child syndrome" where I am a slave to energy and the mind in complete limitation of expressing myself as who I am within and as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create "my time" as more valuable than others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value others time as being less than mine, realizing we are all here in this world within the same time and that with working together we are supporting and assisting each other to make the most of the time we have here as o create what is best for all life this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight and defend my own limitations within the point of comparison and what I am capable of doing and what not, realizing that I can only fight for my own limitations if I am not aware of my own limitations as I exist within the mind that is energy based and thus rely/need energy to move and can not see anything beyond that but its own limitation, instead of breathing and being here in and as the physical as who I am as life one and equal, doing onto another as I would like to be done onto within the realization that only within the mind that exist within a limited bubble in your head can and will defend for its own limitation, as it is all the mind knows, thus to rebirth self within and as the physical where there are no walls limiting self movement to help others and do onto another as you would do onto yourself within the principal of what is best for all life is possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that comparison is normal behavior, realizing that comparison is a manifestation as a infestation within the current way the world is designed and accepted and allowed to exist as where we all compare to win and receive rewards, as this is what capitalism is based on, winners and losers, realizing that this isnt normal behavior but a accepted and allowed behavior as who we decide to be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that comparison is justifiable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that comparison is limitation as a judgment of self within the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that comparing myself to what others are NOT doing to what I AM doing and to react on that as if it is righteous and just when the time comes and I am asked to do more and I say no, not realizing that I am limiting myself and enslaving myself to the mind as energy as polarity of the mind - not allowing any self growth as WHO I AM as life in and as the physical one and equal here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others and what they do in comparison to what I do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself in comparison to what others do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge what I do as always being good and right and more in comparison to what others do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge what others do as always being less than, not enough in comparison to what I do, realizing it is all about WHO I AM, and not what others do, as who I am determines what I do, thus realizing that my actions and reactions is a indicator as to who I have accepted and allowed myself to be, thus I can not see t and change within the understanding that I am only defending my own limitations and enslaving myself within and as the Mind as limitation, thus it is to stop the mind and to breath self into and as the physical one and equal as life.

I commit myself to stop the Rotten child syndrome as who I have accepted and allowed myself to become and exist as one and equal to, and to through writing and self forgiveness stop the mind as enslavement and limitation and to rebirth myself through living the self forgiveness into and as the physical one and equal as life.

I commit myself to expose the Rotten Child syndrome that exist within each one of us as the reward system within this world as capitalism and to show that it is the cause of current parenting and that children isnt thought any real values or Principals of self honor or self respect that is based on LIFE within what is best for all life in all ways and that the Rotten child syndrome is the opposite of the message of Jesus as do onto another as you would like to be done onto you.

I commit myself to show/educate myself and others that we need a new system a system that is not based on reward bt on principal as oneness and equality as that which is best for all life in all ways and that this system is the EqualMoney System and that self forgiveness and self honesty is the key to re-birthing self as life as shown by Desteni how to use the tools.

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