Headache - what can create one? Day 9 of 21 - Day 594

I woke up this morning with a headache, now waking up with a headache for me is very strange, and this headache was very annoying, it is heavy, every slight movement I make where my head is moving, I feel the headache. All day I had to move slowly, I had to be aware of all my movement a lot more.

I assessed what the headache can be, is it due to something physically missing or lacking in the body? Or a mind point. So I drank water and ate fruits and more meals, as I felt my body needed, yet the headache is still here. So now in Self-forgiveness I will open up my experience towards the headache.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate this headache.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame this headache for LIMITING my movements and participation of me during my day and to within this Blame, blame my body for creating this headache, when I know the body does not create headaches, but how I participate and use the body and thus how I accept and allow the mind to run free within doing with the body as it pleases. And thus I am responsible and I must take self-responsibility for my creation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to over think many things during my day instead of acting/living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to THINK about what I want to do and to just keep thinking about it, not acting on it.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize when I SEE what is here and what I can do and I do not act on it, if I do not live what I SEE is possible here and to either direct myself to live it, do it later of right now, and to rather go and THINK more and more on it, and thus when I do not act when I SEE I turn all the potential of the physical into thinking and thoughts and regrets.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create this headache that compromises my physical movement as a reflection of how I have been compromising my physical movement when I do not act but rather turn the potential of me HERE into thoughts, into future and then past and to never LIVE, for real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to JUDGE myself when and as I see what is HERE as the physical living potential of and as ME and to rather go into the mind and not expand myself, live creation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I see a physical living potential where I will benefit and ALL to rather go into the mind as limitations, where I start thinking, I am not ready for this, I need to prepare more for this, I am not professional enough for this, I do not look good enough to do this, I do not have the skills right now that matches what I want to create YET so best that I do nothing at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to LIVE in my mind as thinking as imagination, as I am unable to breathe and direct my reality as the physical when and as I see, and thus as time pass by I create distrust within me within what I see as I have never established trust within myself to simply trust myself and to act, to respond, to create what is HERE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accumulate a headache over so much time of living within the mind and not living, and thus now facing the consequences of my action as my physical body being compromised, where a headache is a red light for where the body is already SO full of accumulated energy that the body/brain cannot even handle it anymore, like a soda bottle that has been shaken and needs to be opene4d up, and thus I can see this is a red light and that if I continue any further the way I have been living I will accumulate more headaches and over time more other physical problems that will match my LIVING one and equal and thus my LIFE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place high expectations on myself of what I am supposed to live, and to within this compromise what I can live and to never act or live but wait and wait and to within this waiting for the right time, when I may be able to live up to my expectations later on create within my mind a mountain of what I haven’t lived and thus must when I am ready make up for all the times and moments I haven’t lived.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a headache to my physical body and capabilities, where I place everything in my head and not live here what’s possible, what is best for all and myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Hold myself back and to rather move back into the mind and so place myself in the back of LIFE and not being an active participant as a creator of me and thus this world that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Judge myself and who I am and what I can say, express, do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR living – what I SEE and to act, to respond, to be responsible, and to rather give into the fear as reasons, justifications and logic to why I am not living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish this headache away without having to physical correct myself of having to investigate the headache and how its manifestation came to be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate the headache and to just want the headache to go away, the same way as I have dealt with creating the headache to when and as I see what is here o be done, to be lived to bring about my utmost potential, to just make it go away and to just not having to live it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight the headache, just as I have been fighting myself to live and to let go of fear to stop the thinking about it and to rather LIVE it and be it, to test it out to develop myself and to be HERE.

I commit myself to when and as I see what is here as to live, to be my utmost potential, to act upon it, to breathe and to push through to not accept and allow ME to become thought, to exist as thought and every other dimension that then forms and takes creation within me as thoughts/thinking and imagination, that is always of consequences that isn’t best for all, and not myself but harmful to the body and of abuse.

Day 30 - Tiredness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that every time I am tired that I must sleep.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that when I am feeling tired that I am tired, lol it is only a feeling, realizing that when I breathe effectively and move myself that I actually will notice an interesting thing, I wake up, proving that the tiredness wasn't real but a mind fuck.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become tired when I go into resistance of something and want to rather hide away.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use sleeping when I suddenly feel tired as a way to hide, realizing that all I need is my 6 to 4 hours of sleep every night that is more than enough as I have proven to myself for 3 months now with doing full time work physically and mentally and thus realizing that any other tiredness is not real but an indication to where I am with in the mind as a resistance/hiding/seeking comfort.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that when I sometimes get tired it is when I am doing nothing, realizing that the tiredness has nothing to do with what I did but is a side effect of laziness and being in the mind as thoughts and back chat, draining the body of physical energy to fuel a alternate reality that isn't real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself when I feel tired and wanting to sleep, realizing it is a point of self honesty with in considering the starting point as who you are in that moment in breath t6hat determines what you do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is impossible for me to stop- being tired with out sleeping first, realizing that I have in the past had many physical events that showed me when sleep is real and when not and that I can simply wake from the sleep or "get over it" through doing physical things and moving myself and breathing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse I am tired to not have to do things.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that me saying I am tired the whole time is making me tired only to be able to use the excuse as a valid excuse that I am tired and cant/wont/don't want to do something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blindly accept feeling with in me as the truth with out questioning it such as feeling tired and with in that see what si real and what is not through physically testing it for myself if possible with in what is best for all life as myself in common sense and self honesty as who you are.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be tired to avoid doing things, deliberately limiting myself and my world and my participation with in it and enslaving myself to the mind and saying that the mind may have power over me as I am no self will to move myself but the mind moves me as a energetic input5 as a robot.

I commit myself to when I feel a sudden tiredness to stop and question why, to look at the practical points, and thus with in that breathe and move myself or write about the point and to check if it is a mind fuck or actual physical tiredness where my body needs rest, as I will know when it is my mind that needs rest then I am in for a mind fuck, as that will be my indicator that I gave away my authority and power to the mind, to my tool, to my servant, and made the mind as my servant my master, as I as the physical is the master that uses the mind as a tool one and equal in functionality in and as the physical and to stop the mind tiredness through directing myself in movement, in breath as that which is best for all life as a self willed human in and as the physical.

 Bernard Poolman - Virus Free Mind

 Life Review - When the Mind Falls in the Face of Reality