Day 355 – Mirage of Self Part 5






I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Make how I look and how I present myself to always be for others, instead of making it for myself and who I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Dress according to what other people like and only what other people like, and to disregard myself and what I can decide I like and what is comfortable with my body, - (outside of the work place for practical purposes).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use cloths to create a mirage of myself, instead of using cloths for the practical purposes only such as when I am at work, or when I am at home.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only care about what I am wearing once I have gotten feedback from others on what they accept and allow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only wear clothes or walk a certain way or to stand in a certain position once I have gotten acceptance and allowance form others that it is all fitting an image and likeness of the mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Believe that the way I am living currently where I have to dress myself only according to what other people are accepting and allowing or where I can walk and talk and act certain ways only when others are accepting and allowing it, and that who I am is always less then, or that who I am naturally is always a fuck up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the way I dress and the way I walk and talk and how I behave around certain people all comes from what I have been taught within my first seven years of my life, through observing and through actually being forced into certain scenarios and events where behaviors and manner and ways or walking and talking and dressing is a custom so to say, and that through all these events I have come to create multiple mirages to give forth to people what I want them to believe/think of me, instead of who I am as the physical where I dress and where I walk and talk and behave because I have self-respect/self/honor and that the way I dress and walk and talk is always supporting the physical and practical and supporting my body instead of an image and likeness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I must be a different person, or simply give forth a mirage of myself depending on where I am and with who I am, seeing and realizing that this in the long term will have schizophrenia effects on me as I am training my body through my mind to split itself a lot into many mirages for many different events and people etc.
To be continued.

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