Day 421 – SOON to be a Father - Part 1

 

2 - 4 weeks to go...

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create pre occupational ideas/beliefs of what it might be being a father to a child.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Belief that what my relationship was as a child towards my father was right or wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my child hood with my father/mother relationship as good or bad.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to look at my childhood and see what is practical and what is not, what is best for all life and what isn’t and to accordingly use within common sense what’s best for all within raising my child, to learn from the past and to change, and to not run away or hide or resist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try/attempt to use my childhood within raising my child, seeing and realizing that this is simply repeating the past and creating a copy of my past onto the child’s life, instead of breathing and LIVING here within common sense and practicality so that my child can live his life and not my past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to access past memories/experiences of my childhood and project it within my child future as a point of FEAR, seeing and realizing how I not have already predetermined my relationship with my child as a projected memory where I already see how I will instead live or do things that is in avoidance to what I have experienced or seen or done in the past, seeing and realizing that this is exactly what my parents did and their parents and yet it never works as this is how the sins of the fathers work, as its creating separation instead of understanding and thus self-forgiveness and correction within what’s best for all life as the living principle.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to NOT slow down and check myself in each moment and what is here moving within me, so that I can see if I am clear and moving in breathe in the present as Life or am I moving as the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions as the baggage of the past and thus smudging the past and tainting the future with the past and thus recreating the past instead of moving forward.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that where there is fear there is where I am making the mistake of moving, instead of breathing and self-forgiving the fear and moving in clarity as breathe here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to NOT see and realize that fear is the past made bigger and more then what the past was and then placing that in the present moment as a total delusion of reality when in fact it’s NOT so/here and what is here is completely simple.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Belief that my past as my thoughts/feelings/emotions that comes from memories that comes from moments that I created experiences within myself within certain moments and that I have defined myself as those moments/experiences/memories/thoughts/feelings/emotions has any value or anything valid within them as to how to raise my child and what’s best for all life.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to simply trust myself as the physical as common sense and practicality as living what’s best for all life in each moment within my integrity as Who I AM, and to trust me as the Physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Belief that any thoughts/feelings/emotions within me of the mind as memories has any value to them as what has been done to me by those that has gone before me within placing value in the past as memories through stories that has been told within raising me, and that this is valuable within raising my child, seeing and realizing that within such teachings one is only teaching the child how to chain oneself to the past and to live in the past instead of being present and breathing here.

To be continued.

Next on more specific points and SCS.