Day 247 – The Death of My Horse Part 5 – The Journey to Life

Titan is the Horse in the Back and Fat is the Orange Horse in the front.
 

Leila wrote a cool blog on the events of the day here that Titan was put down – Day 146: Death of a Horse (Titan)
and continuation on her point here - Day  147 and 148 - Aftermath Death of a Horse

Also to see the process of horses here with us and their process stuff in general, check out the interviews from Eqafe, really cool.

Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 1
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 2
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 3

Continuing from Titan getting cancer removed from his eye and all the events around it.

The point I faced the most with Titan was the reality of having a horse, it is the most basic point to consider when having a horse, that a horse is a animals that comes from the wild but has been domesticated, this has been happening for thousands of years and most horses are now basically just domesticated horses. So their bodies are still designed to be out in the wild but at the same time it has been compromised completely over time.

Thus Titan in general everyday Life gave me this reference point to always consider the reality of anything before I do it, before I go ahead in jump in and to first be real with myself and to remove all the mind delusions/illusions that is here that paints reality with pictures built out of beliefs/ideas/opinions that is always based on self interest.

I found with Titan that a horse’s Hoofs are extremely important, looking at a horse weighing about four hundred to five hundred kilograms which is quite heavy and their Hoofs that is quite small in comparison, has to support their entire body, they use their hoofs ALL the time, unlike humans that these days spend more time sitting and laying down, like sleeping and watching TV and being at restaurants and working in offices or any type of work where sitting is the position mostly used, They have to stand eating and even sleeping, sometimes they lay down but for a short period like really short.

If a horse has any hoof problems or indication of a problem it has to be fixed immediately because it can mean the death of the horse, a horse can’t function on three legs, they need all four, unless you have the time and money to somehow look after a three legged horse and built plastic or mechanical legs for the horse, it is best to prevent that in any case since we live in a world that cares only about money and not LIFE.

I got Titan and one of the main problems was his Hoofs, they were shit, they were really bad, I did not know this at first and thought it is okay, I mean the guy we got Titan from was a Farrier (hoof guy) so he probably knew what he was doing, well I was lacking a lot of self common sense back then within understanding THE PHYSICAL and required my ignorance to be burst through other people showing and telling me what happening – within this process I faced a lot of reaction towards people when and as they would tell me what to do and or how they would tell me mostly, because my ego just could not face the facts that I am not special and do not know anything and that I need to be guided by my hand like a baby again.

I felt like Titans hoof problem was a Burden to me, I really resisted working with his hoofs and fixing it, all I wanted was a horse, not his problems that would take more time and more effort and more of me to consider all points, that just wasn’t me, I disliked it, again personality is limitation and enslavement to energy.

Obviously my dislikes are my Limitations, and this soon was pretty clear to me, other people that has had horse experiences for years and worked with lots of horses before helped me to show me what to do in the mean time and how to take care of it.

I had to place Hoof oil on Titans hoofs every day, I had to clean his hoofs every day for the top part of the hoofs, then there was the bottom part of the hoofs that also had problems, a bit of rotting hoof frog and rashes, this required me to wash Titan’s Bottom hoofs with Luke warm salt water daily or even place his hoofs in a bucket for at least five minutes, now you can image keeping a horse still so that he will keep his hoof in the bucket for five minutes and what that can be like especially if the horse does not YET give a shit about working together with you and till the rot was gone over time and to scrub the (mud rash) with a brush at the back of the hoofs daily with water that I placed some chemical in for support.

The bottom Hoof parts got sorted much quicker than the rest of the entire Hoof, for instance the cracks that the hoofs had and in general the Height of the hoof, since Titans hoofs was flat and cracked it was actually in the opposite of what it is supposed to be.

We got a Farrier out and he did the hoof rasping and cutting out of the froggy part, we changed Titans Diet and we kept his feet looked after. After a while the hoofs started changing, this happens over time as the new part of the Hoof starts to grow out and we just keep on keeping the hoofs in place.

Due to Titans Old age in comparison to what other horses age to currently, not the real actual old age as horses can live up to 50 years when taken care of and looked after from the starting point of LIFE and not motivated by money, his hoofs was expected to never be completely fixed, as the consequences within Titans Body that has manifested through all his years of the Human abuse towards him and the System we have created that dominates over all life in the name of money are already HERE and thus now we can only work with that.

Titans Hoofs never did fully stop cracking and never got perfectly right, but it was one hundred times better than before.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that most if not all conditions horses and all other animals have and has and is still going through is due to the current money system and that all and any abuse done to horses that we see as normal today and that a vet can simply fix is deliberate abuse towards the animals and lfie as it is ALL preventable through simply changing the money system that is here to a new system that instead is LIFE such as the Equal Money System

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that what I like and dislike is part of what makes me special in this world, not seeing and realizing that it is in fact my limitations either way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that as soon as I have a thought within my mind of something that I like or Dislike that in that moment I limit myself to what I am actually in fact capable of doing as the physical through my reaction and resistances, seeing and realizing that all that is really required of me to do it, to move myself and to DO IT because that is real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that what I dislike or Like isn’t real because that doesn’t mean anything in terms of if I can do it or not.

I commit myself to when and as I see a thought come up of where I like or dislike something to stop and to breathe and to look at why am I limiting myself to do something, why would I deliberately Limit myself as to what I can do or not, and to stop that limitation through going where I resist going to show to myself what is real and what is not.

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