Day 249 – The Death of my Horse – The Journey to Life

continuation of Day 242 - The Death of my Horse Titan Part 1
and – Day 243 and 244 – The Death of my horse Titan Part 2 The Journey to Life
and – Day 245 – The Death of My Horse Part 3 the Journey to Life

and – Day 246 – The Death of My Horse Part 4 the Journey to Life

and - Day 247 - The Death of my Horse Part 5 - The Journey To Life

and – Day 248– The Death of My Horse Part 6 – The Journey to Life

Leila wrote a cool blog on the events of the day here that Titan was put down – Day 146: Death of a Horse (Titan)
and continuation on her point here - Day  147 and 148 - Aftermath Death of a Horse

Also to see the process of horses here with us and their process stuff in general, check out the interviews from Eqafe, really cool.

Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 1
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 2
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 3

Many beings die every day, and I can say most if not all of them do not die of old age as all the deaths are not natural, it is consequences/outflows of how we as the humans life here on earth, instead of with earth one and equal.

I mean everything we do DOES in fact have constant influences onto everything else, for instance air pollution in itself makes and all deaths not natural, even if someone does die of old age, due to air pollution that death isn’t natural because it reduced the beings natural life spam over all already which is man created. 

But one thing is always for sure, death is inevitable, it comes for everything one, no matter how hard we try and deny it or run away from it, no matter how much we try and cover up th fact of death with constantly flooding ourselves with happiness and positive energy that makes us feel alive to create the delusion while living that one will stay alive for ever, yet that’s it exactly how it works. 

See there are two options/choices either we are LIFE or NOT, that’s it, if we are life as life one and equal in fact we die as our bodies but well its the physical/life so we simply remain  here, when we choose the Mind as energy and we die, it is GONE. None existent as energy simply ends without getting a constant feed/substance to fuel it.

So the point I am getting to is With Titans Death I faced that point of death once again, I have lost many many pets in my life time due to cancer in my rats, or sick birds or birds that got attacked by cats, or dogs that had to be put down and many other ways, and I have always faced this point of death within myself in those moments. 

What I found different with Titan is that Titan resembled a bit More of Me, because what made Titan different for me from all the other animals was that he was BIG, this one point that was different as simply being the size of the animal showed me again that Death comes to all equally. 

I know that there is/was no difference between the life’s of all the other animals and Titan and their deaths, it is simply within my mind and how my mind made it all seem through the ideas and beliefs.

The beliefs I had was that Big animals such as humans Live a long time, this long time can easily make one delusional that death will never come, specifically for myself, death usually always happens out there to someone else, never to me.

Take bugs for example, Billions die each day, and Tens of Thousands die each minute, and no one gives a shit, no one cares, no one even notices it, because they are Tiny and not even they die of natural causes, it is human cause/effect, so Titans death was more Noticeable to me, but not different.

I faced quite a interesting point within this, I was Who I am and have been Towards Titan in the past four years that I participated with him. 

Who I was/am with him was complete control and dominating him, even when I was having fun with him, it was all from the starting point of Fear, Fear towards Titan and that he could hurt me or Kill me because he was a big animal with extreme superior physical strength in comparison to me.

So here comes the Fear of Death.

Now Titan wasn’t the fear, his is the interesting point, Titan only showed me who i am existing as fear n general, because Titan was simply being himself, a horse doing what he does with his life and co existing, the fear always only existed within me, this constant fear of death, fear that the world and the system we are all living in will Kill me, because this world and this money system we are all accepting and allowing to exist everyday is so big, and because this system and world is so big  all i have ever done was trying to dominate and control to try and prevent this death I fear. 

To be continued on this point

 with Self forgiveness