Day 6 - What stops me from cheating?

 

Before reading this blog – please, if you find any point you judge yourself on or comparing with me, do not do so, but if it comes up, rather at the end leave a comment, ask and discuss. This is but a Blog, not 9 years of specific details.

I have been in a Desteni Agreement for nine years now. I have not once cheated on my wife, I have not once even tried, or spoken to another women with the intention or the attraction to do so, even after Marriage, even after having a child and sex was very little for a very long time, and still is. So what is the secret? 

First, I have to inform you that it is in my programming to cheat, to have multiple girlfriends (women) in my life, this is what I did and used to do before I went into an agreement nine years ago.

The Sexual force was strong in me, and I followed it religiously. I enjoyed the game of getting girls, playing around, taking risks, and always being around lots of women, chatting up dozens of girls at a time, hook up with a few here and there and then see where I can score. 

Now, I must first and foremost make something very clear, the Desire comes up within me for wanting to go back into this every now and then, it is actually always here, I desire having more or multiple women in my life, but then how do I do it to not even once follow it, to not be led into temptation, not even in my words by accident, or in my behaviors towards or with other women, even when it is in my design/programming to do it so easily, without effort. 

I used to fall in love and be attracted to almost any women instantly after meeting them and I would have the same “love” feeling for all the women I ever met and came in contact with, I could never say to one I love you and not to the other as well, I always thought it was a disease that I was attracted to any women almost instantly, I could in a matter of minutes already see myself in a long term relationship with a girl I just met, and if this same girl brought a friend along, I would equally be the same towards her. I found it very annoying at times, especially that one has to choose and only go with one partner. 

The answer is simple and yet at the same time very difficult. The process was difficult as well to get to this point, in fact the first two years of being in the agreement with my partner the habits and patterns wanted to kick in and I wanted out of the agreement a few times through how I behaved and spoke, my thoughts and mind was all over the place. 

Yet, here I am.

First and foremost, It is all thanks to DESTENI and the message, the re-education of me with all the information that Desteni provides within understanding the MIND, what are thoughts, what are feelings and emotions, how do they work, and I must say the most important for me within all of this is that I understood that NO thought, feeling or emotion is EVER real unless we act on it, thus I always know that when a thought come sup, a feeling or emotion, it isn’t real unless I act on it, and thus I BREATHE and I let go of the thoughts, the feelings and emotions. 

Then, the agreement was extremely important that I had to understand what is an agreement – it is really simple, TWO people walking together this life yet individual their process of re-birthing themselves as life and to within this be physical support for one another, not emotional and mind support. 

Here is the catch, I had to actually have NO choice within this, as in do I want to do it or not, because once I understood why I am walking this process of Desteni for myself and thus with another being, there is no choice, there is no do I want to or not, there is simply BREATH and do this. 

Here are a few key points that I ground myself with, with having this design/programming and how I stand within discipline absolutely within this specific point. 

1.       No matter with what women I am in an agreement with, I will always be me, so no OTHER women will change me or make me experience me any different, and thus if I follow my programming I will always end up where I simply follow my programming again and again, and thus never change and actually face myself effectively to change.

2.       ALL humans are minds/programmes/designs – thus if I see a picture as the form of another women and I am attracted to that and go after that and base a relationship off of that, I will inevitably end up with again the programmes/design (thus nothing different) and they have to be faced, and thus cheating or dishonoring the agreement will only be me fucking myself up more and more and in the same process harm others and thus nothing will change.

3.       This one is more personal and based on who I am within an agreement with right now, thus this one can change for others if for example one person is abusive, physically or emotionally – If I cannot walk with the person I am within an agreement with now, then I cannot walk with anyone else equal and one, it is as simple as that, thus leaving my partner for a design/program will only be me deceiving myself on many levels. 

4.       Understanding and walking as that understanding daily that NO person is actually different except the form/image and thus the form image can and will change at any time and thus I will always end up facing the same regardless, either sooner or later. 

5.       Live what is best for all life – basic Desteni principle – this includes stopping ones thoughts, feelings and emotions, ones fantasies, imagination that is NOT within this reality and practical and not bets for all life, within the understanding that all of this was literally programmed into us, as we are organic robots designed and created by the Reptilian race (annunaki, yes you probably do not want to hear that, but it damn supported) as shared in detail by and through the Portal.

Ok, that is what I have to share for now in relation t this point, as I have now walked it for many years and I have proven through space and time that I STAND and that the Desteni tools in fact work if applied effectively, this obviously includes LOTS of self-forgiveness and self-writing on all the points that open up. 

Please feel free to ask questions, I have lots to share, don’t be shy. If you are married, if you have children, if you are having any issues – I can support within this, but consider, any advice is useless without application.

Temptation, I can't resist - Day 585

Thou shall not lead me into temptation is something that I have been looking at within my life. This temptation point is something that we all must consider in our lives in a MUCH deeper dimension.

Most of us think of temptation as something sinful, like I am led into temptation by another women and then I have sex with her and cheated on my partner – or I am at a party and my friend are using drugs and so I am led into temptation and I also took some drugs.

YET – we are missing the biggest picture of where temptation actually fucks us all over on a daily basis, and this temptation isn’t coming from someone else influencing us, anything that can temp us is a inherent temptation and thus we must deal with it, but how we are LIVING temptation on a daily basis is something hidden in plain sight. Let me explain.

Who you are is a Temptation within all its dimensions – are your LIFE or are you SYSTEM, system is what is HERE currently, that which we see all the time, the advertisements on billboards or TV or on the Radio is the Small temptations compared to the LIVING temptation as what we do that stems from who we are. the real temptation is US and our personal living that is shined onto the world.

a small example:

So Coca Cola advertises a Soda, it is tempting you, it is there on a board, you see it, you might even just see it indirectly, but it looks so good, the colors on the board, the words that create a good feeling, a positive feeling, It might say something like, Thirst quenching in the Summer with Friends and a person is holding up a coke bottle in his hands and drinking it while somehow smiling – you now MAKE the decision to sometime during your day, or even in a week to go and buy a coke, you Buy this coke and you now have it in your hands, you as a Person, a human being that is the reflection of all other humans beings as example regardless of what you think or believe of yourself, you are a Model in every breathe, you walk with this coke, you have identified yourself as a coke drinker, you walk with Pride with this coke in the streets, or at your home you have this coke in your fridge where your friends see this coke, or family, and to you it is all “normal” – but one thing isn’t considered, this is YOU leading everyone else into temptation that YOU have a personal responsibility to that lives with you, that sees you, that identifies with you, so you are now a person leading other into temptation – Because people are weak minded (it is evident all around us), their minds are not their own, they are influenced JUST like how you were/are and ME, and so the cycle of temptation keep on going in circles. And this is what keeps the system alive, moving, going, people buying and becoming tempted all the time by everything, especially if you see your fellow "responsible" humans doing it, is by “referral” and what I simply call temptation.

Take another example – when someone shares a video on a social network that is of Kittens, you are tempted, you must click on it, then you feel you must share it, so now you are deliberately tempting everyone else to also spend their time on this video, you are a cause in the chain of what people start seeing and believing as being important, worth it, spending time on, doing. It seems innocent. But isn’t that were the greatest evil can take its cover? Unnoticed, blanketed in something that seem to not have any effect on life? The small things, the detail – there is literally a saying that says, the devil is in the detail.

Once we see and realize that we are Temples of temptation that advertise our religions of ourselves and thus tempting others to live and do the same, we can really start considering everything we do and checking ourselves. This is not to judge a point, this is not to be positive or negative about what is here in this world, it is to become aware of when we do something, what are the consequential outflows of our actions that we are not considering at all, how are we Tempting and LEADING others into temptation, yes we all must be self-responsible, but then we must start living that and rather lead others into the temptation of becoming self-responsible, not keep doing what we have always done and justify our actions with, but they are responsible for themselves, we are NOT yet self-responsible, not to mention even responsible human beings, we are pre-programmed humans, copies that simply do what we see, and specifically what we have been programmed to do as children, of which we have NO memory or idea what is there inside of us.

For example, those that do follow my blogs and what I write, see how you have created already an Image, idea, placed me as a temptation within your mind towards a certain point in life, a representation in your own life ( I know this because I know I do the same), now let’s say I stop everything I am doing right now as standing up for life, walking openly my process with Desteni as a Destonian, exposing myself and what I do and walk, Standing for Equality for all life, common sense, practicality, self-forgiveness, what temptation would that create within everyone that has known me for years, that has read my blogs, seen my vlogs, my hangouts, what I share and stand for?
That everyone else can do the same, perhaps not now immediately with me, but in a year or two, those that stand with will be like, well Gian did it, so why not me. This example goes for those that “know” me. But you can take this to your own life and see it for yourself. I use this extreme example to show, that it happens all the time, we are led into temptation and we are LEADING others into temptation through every single action, word, thing we do in this world all the time, is it best for all life or NOT, OR is it mind based habits, patterns that direct us as our thoughts and feelings and emotions that is done within absolute dishonor towards LIFE and of inequality and only self-indulgence, which is in short ignorance and thus tempting EVERYONE else to do the same.
Take a look at the word temptation and the implications it has in a literal sense on your direct and indirect reality, and we will see the cause of our problems much more. In everything you DO. Lets rather TEMPT the world to be that which is best for all life, for equality, for real change, and this must start with ourselves, we can tempt those around us to want to JOIN equality, self forgiveness, to want to remove brainwashing and mind-control, to become CO-Creators of life and to rebirth ourselves as LIFE. till we are all FREE and temptation can not effect anyone as we all will stand as Creators, equals, full self-responsibility in awareness of LIFE.

and just to clarify, this is about taking it BACK to SELF, not to BLAME anything or anyone, that's actually tempting others to then do the same and so no one ever stands up and we all just blame and become lame.

Drinking
Smoking
Drugs
Candy
Partying
buying plastic bags
supporting big corporations instead of local Markets/people
indulging in entertainment
Playing games a Lot
watching TV a lot
sitting and doing nothing a lot
gambling
only focusing on personal relationships
mind on sex all the time
stress about survival
nagging
complaining
throwing rubbish out the car window
neglecting pets
indulging in pets
painting
building
activism
being stupid
joking all the time
writing blogs on world problems and solutions
making vlogs on world problems and solutions
what you share on social networks
where you like things all over the internet,
where you spend most of your time
the cloths you wear
how you wear your cloths
the face you pull mostly
the words you speak
the behaviors you have
the patterns you live daily

I can write down everything in existence here, literally, the question must always be, is it best for all LIFE, is it practical, is it self-honest (to develop self-honesty one must apply a LOT of self-forgiveness on all points) can your LIFE style be lived by every single human being on earth and what will the outcome of earth be then?

Thou Shall not lead me into temptation = the MIND shall not lead me into temptation to LIVE out the mind and self-interest as the mind is MY tool and not ME, I will stand and BE the directive principle and the Authority of ME, thus I WILL myself to be AWARE of me and what is HERE within all dimensions to stand as the solution one and equal to the problem that is here, and live it in each breathe.

Investigate desteni.org - free yourself from all temptations through taking self-responsibility as a co-creator of life.

Day 541 – Investigating Ego Part 1

I was once told by an old school friend, Gian, You have a big ego, while this person wasn’t looking at me with a smiley face, it was more of a concerned and disgust face, but in micro expressions almost, because it was a friend and the friend didn’t want to “insult” me, so to say. 

So my first impression was, EGO means, when someone thinks a lot of or about themselves, as in general, everyone thinks about themselves and only themselves, but if you have an ego, then you think a LOT about or of yourself.

After this friend said those words to me, I was a bit angry, because I could not properly distinguish between him and me and why only I have a BIG ego, the main reason for my anger was, because I did not actually understand the word ego, I assumed what ego means due to the moment we had, I was talking about girls and parties and so on, which included me a lot, and my friend was talking about girls differently, he was more the romantic type, and I was more the player type as I can recall, so my way of talking about “girl’s” was insulting to him in a way, and thus he reacted and said to me I have a Big ego, basically only thinking about myself.

After this interaction, I walked away and I was now concerned about this ego thing, in fact I didn’t know how personal I took it till later on the same day, I was thinking about this ego thing so much that I built up more and more anger towards my friend saying I have a big ego, my back chat started running where I would think things like, “how can you say I am only thinking about myself, any guy in this world wants sex and no matter how you play the game it Is ALL about yourself, the male, the sex, I simply approached it less intimately and more in a cold way, so the separation part is easier for both.

I basically reacted to my friend saying what he is doing is all about the “girl” yet he knows as a guy as ME that it is never about the girl, the girl has what the man wants, simple.

So I created a grudge towards this friend, but secretly, in fact I made it my goal to PROOF to this friend that what he is doing as a “romantic guy” that his way is still JUST a game and nothing different from mine, and thus also EGO because it is only about HIM and HIS wants/desires.

As the days in school went by, I obviously interacted with this friend normally, but whenever I got the opportunity, I would say things to him to “test” his mind and where it is, very subtly, I will say things that only me “type” and ego will like, and not his romantic type, but I said the things I did in such a clever way that I could show him that he is no different.

For example, I would go sit next to this friend that has now labeled me as a BIG EGO guy because I talk about women as sex objects, where he does not do those things because he is so much better and mature and apparently has a deeper connection and understand women more and knows it isn’t all about sex and blab bla bla (the mind of a sixteen year old) and I would just sit there, quite next to him, and then I would ask him simple questions, like – what girl do you like? And he would say, no one at the moment, and then I would look at a girl that is walking around on the school grounds that is judged as not so pretty and outcast, and I would point and ask him, do you like that girl? And there, on his face, a face of disgust, the frown, and he would then look at me and say, Gian, why are you asking me this, and I would say, I am just checking if you as a “romantic guy” that do not see girls as just sex objects but that there is more and something emotional apply his rules to any women, or only pretty women, he reacted, stood up and walked away.

See, my point was, I wanted to proof to him that he is full of bullshit and just EGO as well, no matter how pretty he painted the picture in his mind, because if it is about beauty, and that you can only be a romantic to someone that is seen as a “sex symbol” – well, then you are only thinking about yourself and or of yourself in the whole picture, no different than me, I just did it openly.
The story of Ego to be continued.

Day 539 - opening up points of fear and regret

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR letting go of the fears within me that I have used to define me and to thus guide me and control me and keeping me enslaved to patterns and behaviors that I believe is best for me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the consistent fear of not having money and security within this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the consistent fear of being all alone in this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of what others think of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of what others might do to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of what this money driven system can do to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of being harmed by other humans.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of not having a roof over my head.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of living the same way as billions of others do in this world, in poverty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of losing what I hold dear through changing or through circumstances.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing my time and the time that I have within this world and not using it to my utmost potential.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of doing something wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of failing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in the fear of being seen and actually being different from society.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear trusting myself and what that might mean, which is unknown.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself as the unknown.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be trapped in this world system and not be able to change a thing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the world coming to an end as an actual desire that I had as a kid, just ending everything, and now seeing this desire was actually a denial of a fear within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear JUST doing what I see I need to do in moments and to push myself beyond my fear in any moment to do what is required to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear doing things out of fear and to within this do things out of fear anyway.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide from my fears.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my fears and deny my fears.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear this reality and the cruelty that exist within it, from the system to the human that created it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to actually take that step to truly change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing what that actual first step is to actually change and to take a stand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give myself to the service of life absolutely.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that if the world/my life changes that I will face myself as who I am and what I could have done to bring change to this world that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that at the end of my life that I will face myself as regret.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear regret.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear me facing my self-dishonesty at death as who I have accepted and allowed myself to be and live as, as fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing myself as consequences that isn’t best for all life and that knowing that who I am currently isn’t yet standing as LIFE and thus I know where I must move my ass.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to already live in regret and to fear that because of this regret I will not be able to ever actually change anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my past as who I have accepted and allowed myself to be and to define myself as and to within this fear that I will just die as a past and not as LIFE that is standing in absolute self-honesty and that I everything in my power to change this world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear looking crazy within me expressing myself to bring change to this world that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear saying and speaking the common sense and the self-honesty that is required to be spoken to penetrate this reality and to bring change, starting with myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will never get rid of my past as a current definition of who I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing the truth about me into the core of who I am and to stand up from that and to see what is HERE for real as LIFE, where nothing is painted in thoughts/emotions/feelings to be something else, and to fear what I might see as OUR creation that is here of abuse and absolute dishonor to life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing the dishonor that I have existed as and still do to some extent towards LIFE.