Day 6 - What stops me from cheating?

 

Before reading this blog – please, if you find any point you judge yourself on or comparing with me, do not do so, but if it comes up, rather at the end leave a comment, ask and discuss. This is but a Blog, not 9 years of specific details.

I have been in a Desteni Agreement for nine years now. I have not once cheated on my wife, I have not once even tried, or spoken to another women with the intention or the attraction to do so, even after Marriage, even after having a child and sex was very little for a very long time, and still is. So what is the secret? 

First, I have to inform you that it is in my programming to cheat, to have multiple girlfriends (women) in my life, this is what I did and used to do before I went into an agreement nine years ago.

The Sexual force was strong in me, and I followed it religiously. I enjoyed the game of getting girls, playing around, taking risks, and always being around lots of women, chatting up dozens of girls at a time, hook up with a few here and there and then see where I can score. 

Now, I must first and foremost make something very clear, the Desire comes up within me for wanting to go back into this every now and then, it is actually always here, I desire having more or multiple women in my life, but then how do I do it to not even once follow it, to not be led into temptation, not even in my words by accident, or in my behaviors towards or with other women, even when it is in my design/programming to do it so easily, without effort. 

I used to fall in love and be attracted to almost any women instantly after meeting them and I would have the same “love” feeling for all the women I ever met and came in contact with, I could never say to one I love you and not to the other as well, I always thought it was a disease that I was attracted to any women almost instantly, I could in a matter of minutes already see myself in a long term relationship with a girl I just met, and if this same girl brought a friend along, I would equally be the same towards her. I found it very annoying at times, especially that one has to choose and only go with one partner. 

The answer is simple and yet at the same time very difficult. The process was difficult as well to get to this point, in fact the first two years of being in the agreement with my partner the habits and patterns wanted to kick in and I wanted out of the agreement a few times through how I behaved and spoke, my thoughts and mind was all over the place. 

Yet, here I am.

First and foremost, It is all thanks to DESTENI and the message, the re-education of me with all the information that Desteni provides within understanding the MIND, what are thoughts, what are feelings and emotions, how do they work, and I must say the most important for me within all of this is that I understood that NO thought, feeling or emotion is EVER real unless we act on it, thus I always know that when a thought come sup, a feeling or emotion, it isn’t real unless I act on it, and thus I BREATHE and I let go of the thoughts, the feelings and emotions. 

Then, the agreement was extremely important that I had to understand what is an agreement – it is really simple, TWO people walking together this life yet individual their process of re-birthing themselves as life and to within this be physical support for one another, not emotional and mind support. 

Here is the catch, I had to actually have NO choice within this, as in do I want to do it or not, because once I understood why I am walking this process of Desteni for myself and thus with another being, there is no choice, there is no do I want to or not, there is simply BREATH and do this. 

Here are a few key points that I ground myself with, with having this design/programming and how I stand within discipline absolutely within this specific point. 

1.       No matter with what women I am in an agreement with, I will always be me, so no OTHER women will change me or make me experience me any different, and thus if I follow my programming I will always end up where I simply follow my programming again and again, and thus never change and actually face myself effectively to change.

2.       ALL humans are minds/programmes/designs – thus if I see a picture as the form of another women and I am attracted to that and go after that and base a relationship off of that, I will inevitably end up with again the programmes/design (thus nothing different) and they have to be faced, and thus cheating or dishonoring the agreement will only be me fucking myself up more and more and in the same process harm others and thus nothing will change.

3.       This one is more personal and based on who I am within an agreement with right now, thus this one can change for others if for example one person is abusive, physically or emotionally – If I cannot walk with the person I am within an agreement with now, then I cannot walk with anyone else equal and one, it is as simple as that, thus leaving my partner for a design/program will only be me deceiving myself on many levels. 

4.       Understanding and walking as that understanding daily that NO person is actually different except the form/image and thus the form image can and will change at any time and thus I will always end up facing the same regardless, either sooner or later. 

5.       Live what is best for all life – basic Desteni principle – this includes stopping ones thoughts, feelings and emotions, ones fantasies, imagination that is NOT within this reality and practical and not bets for all life, within the understanding that all of this was literally programmed into us, as we are organic robots designed and created by the Reptilian race (annunaki, yes you probably do not want to hear that, but it damn supported) as shared in detail by and through the Portal.

Ok, that is what I have to share for now in relation t this point, as I have now walked it for many years and I have proven through space and time that I STAND and that the Desteni tools in fact work if applied effectively, this obviously includes LOTS of self-forgiveness and self-writing on all the points that open up. 

Please feel free to ask questions, I have lots to share, don’t be shy. If you are married, if you have children, if you are having any issues – I can support within this, but consider, any advice is useless without application.

Day – 48 – bad boy continued.

This is a continuation of Day 47 – loving the bad boy

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when someone judges me as bad that it does not mean I am bad and therefore must now live as being bad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when I accept someone else calling me bad that I am actually not bad until I go out and do physical things in my life and create myself as bad deliberately within my actions, and thus it is not the other person to blame as I am clearly self responsible for my own actions.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the bad boy personality is just another personality that I have created myself through my own self judgments and insecurities.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when I went out and started living differently within acting out in life against the system as being bad within spitefulness that I was actually only harming myself as I set myself on the path of self destruction, instead of realizing that the system is fucked up and the current limited way of life where society imposes good and bad onto people through their own self created believes and idea on what is good and bad instead of living what is best for all life and thus instead realizing that I must be self honest and change the god damn system to what is best for all life and to not accept and allow a system that is fear based and judgmental towards life as normal.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that the bad boy act/personality was part of my ticket to getting sex as I learned that girls like bad boys and so I pursuit in my journey of self destruction to fulfill one desire of obtaining sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that being a bad boy to spite others is actually me spiting myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the bad boy live just happened to me, suppressing and denying all the actions I took within the physical as living and creating events situations to have certain experiences to upgrade myself to a bad boy as where I made it part of me, and thus it did not just happen to me, I am responsible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make myself believe I am a victim within who I am and become through my own actions that I take.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to victimize myself within my actions as if I cannot stop myself as if I am forced to do the thing si do as the bad boy, realizing that I can simply stop and change as I am the one moving and directing myself to do the things I do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be addicted to the excitement of being a bad boy, realizing that the energy as excitement that I get from doing the bad boy things will run out and that I will seek it like a drug addict seeking his next hit, and that this will lead to me doing more and more extreme things that would lead to consequences that will harm me and others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider the physical consequences I am creating for myself and others within trying to be a bad boy in spitefulness towards those tat has judged me as bad, realizing that I am only harming myself in spite of the evidence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to break down relationships in my world and hurting others through my actions as being a bad boy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a asshole as the ad boy act personality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to  gossip about other people and being nasty to them just to keep up the bad boy act as being better more and less limited as a self created believe based on the idea I have created about myself as being a bad ass, realizing I am only placing my judgments as gossip and my insecurities on others and projecting myself on them to hide my own shit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a jerk towards my fellow humans and animals and plants in the name of being s spiteful shit through not taking self responsibility for myself and who I am, and giving away myself responsibility to accept and allow others to influence me as who i am and live it out in blame and self pity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as spitefulness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately abuse girls as the excuse of I am a bad boy – you should have expected it from me, realizing that I am within this only creating more consequences for myself as I break people and relationship around me till I am all alone and fucked within this world, realizing I created it for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse my body through drinking and drugs and fighting and doing crazy stunts to show off in the name of being a bad boy, realizing the physical consequences has a high price and then the bad boy will be a useless bag of meat at a early age or older.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in secret as a pretentious bad boy and to be a pretentious ass in front of others never finding out who I really am, as I decide who I am and not giving myself this chance through constantly feeding polarities on both ends missing myself completely.

I commit myself to look within my life where I access the bad boy personality and to see why, to write and to self forgive myself and to stop, to end the abuse caused within my world through spitefulness and blame and to take self responsibility as myself and to bring about a world that is best for all life and not what is based on stupid made up rules of right and wrong, but rather what is practical and best for all life (plants, animals, humans etc) and to stop the creation of mental unstable humans that has split personalities in secret and in front of others and create mental disorders that the medical industries and psychologist make billions off.

I commit myself to expose the current believes and rules of the world as it exist now as not being what is best for all life or any individual as it is based on fear and right and wrong and not what is best for all life as common sense but on stupid make believe ideas/opinions that is based on self interest and imprinted into the children and then play out as mental disorders where the child is constantly in a fight for what is write and what is wrong instead of real values and principles that is best for all life in all ways, thus establishing the equal money system is the path as the common sense system.