105 – I can Survive anywhere/anything Character.

This character basically leads my life, it always has, the I “can” survive anywhere in any situation with any or all people and types of things. 

Even if I have to Sell my soul I would do so just to survive. I would do what ever it takes, even if it means changing everything about me, changing my mind set, changing my characters, changing my personalities, changing how I look act behave and even speak. Just to survive anywhere and anything.

This came as far back as I can remember from school days and when I had to switch schools and friends and situations and where I had to fit in with the environment and the people to not be abused and kicked out and to be seen as an outcast. 

Within this I literally did anything I had to to survive, to fit in and to show that I can survive, I am a survivor.

So obviously looking at this point I can see that it isnt a natural way of Human nature, because I had to deliberately teach myself and transform myself and deceive myself and mold myself to become a survival machine, if it was Human nature to be like that from birth then I would have not had to do all that and simply fit in naturally. 

So this also shows me that school only teaches how to survive in a system that everyone knows is unfair and that everyone knows only a few will be able to get the good jobs as there is only so many good jobs and that the rest will have to be the people that suffer and work the hardest and do all the shitty jobs, this is actually made clear as school clearly consist out of winners and losers and that the winners and losers are actually promoted in front of the school through events that take place such as competitions on all levels, from friend groups and everything happening in the friend groups to sports and academical achievements. Showing kids that only some can make it as there can only be one winner and the rest is actually losers then and that is how the system works, a few thousands in the world have EVERYTHING and the rest have the shit and this also makes kids give up on themselves as being the losers and thus accepts and allows life to be so because there is no other way, and those that already have the advantages in school as the parents had more money already or so forth, they will always compete the most or not much at all and always seem to be the winners already and always get the prizes. So mysterious I always thought. 

So Here I am facing the character that I have created, actually this is many characters in one of the same – The survival character.

I will be going into this character into deep details and how and why I play this character out.

What is the fears, the insecurities, the ideas, beliefs, judgments and the opinions that formed and created this character and to then de-construct the character so that I can see how I have fucked myself, basically LOST myself within this character, I have manifested and created myself as this survival character to such and extend that I create and manifest all and everything about me just to survive, all the time. 

My every word, my every action, my every expression is moved and directed and comes from this character that must/want to survive any and all things at all times, its a vicious cycle.

So stay tuned as I go into the survival character.

Day 104 – Parents Held Accountable Part 3.

I commit myself to rebirth myself through writing/self forgiveness and to live the correction and as the physical and to become the living expression of/as life one and equal in all ways, so that when and as I bring a child into this world the child will not be nothing less than life as the physical as all that is here one and equal within full understanding of how everything here functions.

I commit myself to purify myself and to stop the mind as enslavement/limitation/mind control and to rebirth myself through writing/self-forgiveness and applying myself in and as the physical as that which is best for all life in all ways before I bring a child into this world.

I commit myself to educate myself effectively on what it actually in fact means to raise a child and what it actual implies in and as the physical and how raising a child is in fact, how the world will be as the result of the parent as the child.

I commit myself to show to parents that their children is but only products of who they are and that the world is an end result as the consequences of how the children was raised and that all parents is accountable for the way the world is.

I commit myself to investigate and to research how effective parenting must be applied to bring about a world that is best for all life and where each and every child is brought up/raised to be at their fullest potential as LIFE.

I commit myself to educate and inform all parents and soon to be parent that having a child isnt a right they have it is a responsibility they must prepare to take on as they must be prepared in all ways and only then through in fact being ready to have children that will be raised effectively and to their fullest potential and that will create and manifest a world that is best for all life in all ways and to show that any other way is abuse to the child and LIFE.

I commit myself to to show to all parents that children is a copy of who they are and that is the copy isnt what is best for all life then the world will only remain as hell and life as we know it will end.

I commit myself to show that all parents is accountable and that they are aware of what they are doing in their words and deeds.

I commit myself to show that parents that did not prepare for years on how to raise a child should never have a child unless they have gone through training and actually made a directive decision to have children within the starting point of what is best for all life as their self honesty.

I commit myself to educate myself on/in being an effective parent for when and as I have children within and as the principal of what is best for all life to create a child/adult that is a living custodian of earth and that is developed to his/her full potential in and as the physical.

Day 103 – Parents held Accountable Part 2.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when a child is born into this world that the child is an empty Vessel and that who/what the child becomes is determined on what is put into the child and that this is the responsibility of the parents and how they teach their children, and so I see and realize that all parents must be held accountable for what is here on earth as the end result of how they raised their children as children of the future.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see the blatant truth in and as the physical as what is here as the parents being the ones that brings the future as the children into this world that as how they are taught and raised by the parents and their acceptances and allowances that the children will accordingly create the world, and that the evidence that is here in and as the physical shows clearly that what parents are teaching and how they are bringing up their children and what they accept and allow within the children as themselves is not what is best for all life and that it is in fact destroying life as we know it.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that I as the parents are equally responsible for what is here, as I am a copy of parents and thus I am the end result as the parents and thus I can see as who I am as the parents is not what is best for all life in all ways and thus I must change me, as I am the change and in so take responsibility to show the parents that the way of parenting was and is not best for the child and the world at all through my change and what is possible and how, and to in this hold the parents accountable as I hold myself accountable for what is here and to stand together and walk till a new way of parenting is here that is best for all life in and as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold parents high and as if they are special and know what they do, not realizing that the world is created though parenting, and if all parents as they give themselves to be, were the good parents knowing what to do with their children that the world would have been heaven on earth and as the actual physical evidence is showing it is not heaven on earth and actually hell, thus confirming that parenting is currently only an idea people have in their minds that they try and force onto reality and not an actual consideration of the physical and the new born baby.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that there is no such thing as good parents or bad parents, but that all parents are ignorant and not informed on what parenting actually in fact mean, as each parent must be made aware that as they have a child they have the future of the world in their hands and what is here and exist here on earth and thus all parents must be informed that they will be held accountable as the responsibility they have as children determine the course of history for all life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that a child can only be who the parents are, and thus through this understanding I see and realize that who parents are when they have children must be that which is best for all life in all ways, if the parents have children and they are based in fear and self interest they will only create demons to roam earth and continue hell till all is burned down.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Parenting isn’t a gift that one gets, it is in FACT something that must be taught to the couple that wants children before they have children to give principles and guidelines and thus when and as the child is born the parents will not have the child in fear of “what the fuck now” but they will know that they planned and it and with direction and a set of rules that will create a child that has no mental disorders, no physical disorders and to instead raise a child in full awareness of how the PHYSICAL body and mind function to raise and educate the child one and equal with what is here in understanding and direction so that the child WILL develop to its full potential.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that parenting happening out of emotion and feeling and from the starting point of self interest and love and ideas will not be successful as feelings/emotions and beliefs fade away and so the child will feel and manifest as the consequences of abuse either mentally/physically or emotionally and thus create a broken child that will never meet its full potential as the parents starting point was in fact all about themselves and how they feel and not what is best for all life in all ways as the child’s life.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that parenting isn’t a gift but it is a skill that must be taught and given to those who want to have children and that to want to have children with blind faith is in fact abuse as you will create a child that is blind as your faith and that will be a manifestation of hope and feeling lost as there was no physical direction given to the child.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Parents before they have children must proof that they are worthy of having children and they know and understand how to raise a child in and as the physical one and equal as the physical mind and body to raise a child to its fullest potential and not to create and manifest a child that is less than what they child could have, as this is a in fact a point that all parents must be held accountable for that they did deliberately through not preparing for a child physically and mentally within full understanding of how the physical functions of the mind ad body to only benefit a child and to create and manifest a world as the result of the child that id only at its fullest potential within that which is best for all life as the result of the child’s upbringing.

To be continued.

Day 102 – Parents held Accountable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that parents have ALL the right in the world to raise their children as they want to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Justify that Parents have ALL the right in the world to raise their children as they see fit/want to because it is THEIR child.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Children does not belong to parents as each and every child is the future of all LIFE including me/animals/plants/earth even if it is someone else s child, if the child isn't raised within what is best for all life than the child will not be a child that considers all life which includes my life even if it isnt even my child, thus I am as everyone else equally responsible for the up bringing of all children and thus Parents can not have the right to raise their children as they see fit, as the child belongs to no one, as the child is everyone's future and not just the parents future, thus the child is of LIFE and the parents have the responsibility to teach this to their kids as what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief/see it as wrong when someone else tells parents how to raise their children, realizing that Parents have no fucking Idea how to raise children and yet they have children in the hope of knowing, thus teaching thechild everything they know in who knows what manners that is abusive, and obviously not creating a better world for all as the evidence is seen in how the world is currently now due to parents raising children, as the parents are the results of their parents (sins of the fathers)

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Parents decide the future of the world in how they teach and bring up their kids, showing in clear evidence as the world exist currently that what children is/are being taught is pure evil and not what is best for all life and thus all Parents MUST/will be held accountable.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Children that becomes adults is the product of the parents and thus the world is a end result of the children that the parents brought up and thus it is in clear evidence showing that how parents are teaching and bringing up children isn't effective at all or changing the world or in the best interest of all life, but in self interest that is evil and bringing the destruction of life as we know it. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that Parents are responsible in all ways.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to question parents and how they raise children within the belief that how they bring up their child is holy and sacred and their right as GOD to create their child in their image and likeness as they please even if it brings a world of evil for all as the world currently is the evidence of how parents raise children.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that a child can only be that which the parents teach the child and how they raise the child in the physical.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that children can not be anything else than what parents are teaching and showing and thus the world can not be anything else than what parents are teaching the children that grow up and run the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear parents and questioning their parenting, realizing that as long as I do not stand up and question and say look at what you are doing look at the world it is the result of what you are doing that I am accepting and allowing the abuse equally and not allowing change to come to earth before it is to late. thus equally my self responsibility.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to TRUST parents instead of trusting myself, and how they teach children and bring them up, realizing that the parents does not have a fucking clue what they are doing and thus can only teach the child what they have been taught and how they were taught and thus only creating copies, and so I see and realize that the parents that was and is part of the world and how it exist now and they they are the once that created it and kept it they way it is and did not being forth a better world for all life, that they will in their teaching only great children that turns into adults that will only continue the evil cycle that is destroying life. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to respect parents and how they bring up children while the children they bring up does not even respect LIFE as a indication to who the parent is, realizing that Parents MUST be held accountable and they WILL be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Standing up to the parenting within this world in the fear of that all parents will take it personally and not be able to recognize the simple truth of that how they raise children is how the world is/will be and that the evidence is here that it is not effective at all and that parenting as we know it is evil, there is no other way of saying it. 

To be continued.

Day 101 – Fear of being Tired – its late I must sleep now.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I see myself looking at the time to go into the thought of seeing myself as “tomorrow I will be tired and not physically capable of doing work” this I can see comes from past experiences as memory/past where I have before went to bed late and thus woke up and feeling all tired and not “ready” for the day. And to then go into the back chat of “ If I do not go to bed in 10min when it is eleven o’clock I will only get 7 hours of sleep which is already less than 8 hours, as I was taught in school and by my parents that a person needs at least 8 hours of sleep to have a healthy body and mind to function” “ I have to go to sleep before 12 otherwise I will be a walking zombie tomorrow” – and thus I see and realize the brainwashing as knowledge and information taught to me by those that went before me, as thsi is a point of fear, where the parents and teachers taught me that I must get at least 8 hours of sleep a night or I will not have a healthy body and mind, as the parents and teachers have the fear of me not being healthy in my mind and body to function well enough to take in the information needed to be programmed me into an effective making for the system to make money and survive, thus I see and realize that as I have accepted and allowed this fear within me of not getting enough sleep I have within myself manifested the physical consequences within my daily living when I have not had enough sleep according to the knowledge and information given to me that I will actually use this knowledge and information to tell my body when it has not had 8 hours of sleep that I MUST be tired and that I can not function to my full potential, realizing that this is brainwashing and mind control, instead of breathing and being here in and as the physical where I walk as the actuality of the physical and not within thoughts/feelings/emotions/back chat based on knowledge and information of how I must apparently feel because I did not get 8 hours of sleep. 

I forgive myself that  have accepted and allowed myself to go to sleep in the fear of not getting enough sleep when and as I see the clock/time is already past 11 or 12 and that I have to wake up in 6 or 7 hours which is not 8 hours and to then already through going to sleep within and as this fear of tomorrow I will not be effective and my body and brain will not function correctly as I was told of How I should experience myself when the situation occurs and to the already determine how I will experience myself when I wake up, instead of realizing that it is only me that is keeping the knowledge and information within me of what should and should not happen that is giving actual signals to my body of how it should now be or not and thus I am within the back chat/thoughts/feelings/emotions creating my experience as such instead of breathing and being here where I give not signals to my body based on the knowledge and information taught to me and thus the physical will show me what is real and what is not as that which is here.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that if I was never taught about the “need” for 8 hours sleep and how I will or will not experience myself that It simply would have never existed for me and never effected me and that I would then only have learned the truth of what is here and not what is based on knowledge and information but as the physical and what the physical is showing me what is already here and is always here and does not require knowledge and information to tell me how I should or should not experience myself. 

I commit myself to when and as I see myself looking at the clock/time to breathe and to not connect any mind ideas/beliefs/opinions about what the time means in relation to how I should/should not experience myself and to instead breathe and see what is here one and equal as the physical and to move and direct myself according to breathe and not time, yet to use time to give me direction and indication of functioning within the current system to remain practical yet not to connect any thoughts/emotion/feeling/back chat to the time.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself connecting any thoughts/feelings/emotions/ideas/beliefs/opinions/memories/back-chat to the time to stop and to breathe and to remain here as breathe and to use and see as the physical what is here as me as breathe in fact and to move and direct myself as such and to not be limited or enslaved as time yet to move time as me one and equal as the breath.

Day 100 – beyond my own self belief, one Hundred days of writing,

One hundred days of writing in the 7 year Journey to Life, It feels/seems like I started a month ago only, yet it has been a bit more than three months of writing Blogs everyday within the seven Year Journey to Life – see the facebook page where we all that is/are writing the blogs share it and read each other’s blogs and how we walk as a group yet as individuals to birth ourselves as life to take on all characters and all patterns that is not Best for all Life in all ways and to show/proof that human nature is simply part of the current system we live in making it so, and that through the writing and applying what we write practically living it we can/have stopped patterns and changed to live what is best for all life in all ways and so as each one starts their Journey to life blogs and write and share and removing all brainwashing and mind control and enslavement we will so one man/women at a time change the world for ever to a place that is best for all life.

What have I learned within my one hundred blogs that I have written thus far?

I have learned that I can write everyday and be consistent within it – whereas before in my life I have never thought of myself to even be able to write even one blog, never mind two, and this character I had of (“ME writing a blog, lol that is for losers”) as a belief/idea/judgment I had/kept of myself was so due to programming of that is just in your nature Gian (me) to never be able to sit down and write and actually post the blog on the internet for all to see/read and share/learn/support/assist self/others, and that I can never change it, yet here I am and I proved that I can change it through the writing of self forgiveness of deconstructing the Characters/patterns of complete and utter self limitation and enslavement.

I have learned that I can sit down for an hour or three and I can start a blog and I can actually take one Character/pattern and write it out for myself and apply SF on the character and pattern and that I can lay it out for myself in front of my own eyes and see that what I am living and what I belief to be real is in fact just so because I make it so due to beliefs/ideas/opinions/judgment and that it all comes from memory and past experiences that I have identified myself with/as and thus created myself as that and so lived it as if it is all that I can be, yet here I am, I proofed this one point to myself, that I can change a Pattern, that I can through walking the correction after writing it out for myself stop the self limitation/abuse of the patterns that is not best for all or even for my own development as a complete human being that can achieve my full potential and that I can in the place of that pattern live a correction that I lay out for myself within self commitments and thus through living it in and as the physical – the same way I created all the other patterns/characters – create and manifest what is best for all life, thus this being me as Who Idecide who I am as LIFE as the physical one and equal as all LIFE.

I also learned that there is a extremely long road ahead for humans on earth as I am seeing myself being here at my one hundredth blog, Yet it is possible, change is possible as I have seen within changing one pattern thus far, writing my blog every day. And that it is necessary that ALL who can hear this message start the Journey to Life blog writing daily, to see and investigate what we are doing and to see in common sense and self honesty what is necessary for REAL actual change that can last eternally, as this is a must for human nature to change – and as I have seen it is possible.

I have also learned over the past three months – as this is a really cool point for me within writing my daily blogs in the journey to life blogs that writing everyday in self forgiveness and writing is the greatest self support and assistance I can give myself within stabilizing myself, you know when you have a mind full of all the crap thoughts, the nasty thoughts, the anger thoughts the constant thinking that just does not want to stop, you know the nights you cannot fall asleep because you are thinking and so busy in your mind the whole time, and then it starts to get to you, well writing it out in self forgiveness if releasing yourself of that, giving you back to yourself and, and after a while you will see your mind becoming more and more quite, still thoughts, still things coming up, but it is at a level where I can handle it with breathing and not letting it take over my day and my life and so the journey shows that what is in the mind isn’t real as I/we can simply stop it. Thus what remains here in and as the physical is the reality – real that we have to take self responsibility for as a group each individual at a time.

What I have also learned is that as a group writing and self forgiving ourselves we will change the world as WHO WE ARE, because who I am determines what I do, it simply is that way, you have to be someone living a certain principle to secondly do what you do, you cannot do something without first making a decision within you as who you are, thus we must change who we are to that which is best for all life in all ways and so we will create a world that is BEST for all life in all ways, why would we want anything less than the best for ourselves and all other life, when all life has the best there can be we are living the best life possible. Unlike the current system that is simply our own doom.

I ask that all that come into contact with this blog or the vlog that is made on it, to join the Journey to life Blogs, and write everyday for a new world that is best for all life in self forgiveness and commitments, you will never be ready till you do it. So doing it starts when you do it lol.

Otherwise waiting becomes your master and you will be victim to all that you allow to happen, yet at the same time the creator of what happens as the waiting allows it, time is limited, yet we have time, lets use each breathe and make each breath actually in fact COUNT, do not waist your breathe.

Join the forums and the equal money website, become the change you want – a BEST and better world in fact for yourself and all life. 

www.desteni.org

www.equalmoney.org

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