Desteni - a Trip into South Africa, and some Dance Music (7 songs)

Day 405 – Sex Part 3

Day 403 - SEX part 1
Day 404 - SEX Part 2

to make sure you have no reaction to the word sex, you must be able to say sex and there must be nothing moving, otherwise you will be a good target for the system to fuck with you.

SEX SEX SEX.

Commitments.

I commit myself to when and as I hear the word sex to breathe, to not go into any energetic reaction as good or bad or to judge ot to go into the Imagination, Instead I breathe and I remain here within what is real, Sex is a word, a word referring to a action performed by two beings within intimacy (into me I see) and nothing more as the mind has made it through Ideas/Beliefs/opinions. 

When and as I see that I am connecting MORE things to the word sex such as Opinions/beliefs/ideas, I stop and I breathe, seeing and realizing that this is all programmed into me from family/school/friends/culture/religion/society of which none is based on actual reality and all from made up Ideas/opinions/beliefs that are from fear/control/power.

When and as I see the WORD Sex and anything comes up within me towards/in relation to the word sex, I stop and I breathe, seeing and realizing that when and as I hear/see the word SEX and that there is anything coming up within me, that this is a possession, a spirit of mind taking me over, that is not real but an energetic charge that I have connected to the word SEX, which means I am controlled and brainwashed, I am accepting and allowing myself to be Influenced by this word, seeing and realizing that as long as I accept and allow to be influenced by the word SEX that I can be manipulated/controlled and be redirected by any form of advertisement/consumer propaganda or agenda, as all that someone/something else has to do is present the word sex and my preprogramming that I have defined the word sex with will impulse me and thus direct me.

When and as I see that I react to the word SEX through hearing or reading it, I stop and I breathe – I commit myself to NOT follow or to react on the word through breathing and investigating the moment of why I reacted and to forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to condition myself with brainwashing that is from Beliefs/Opinions/Ideas created by a society of Zombies that make shit up to feel alive/more/special and to keep it real, reeling in reality so that I am here and focused on actual shit, as shit is real and no plastic rapping or chocolate sprinkles can change shit from being shit. 

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am in fear of using the word sex even when it is necessary, I stop, I breathe, as I see and realize that it is preprogramming that I have accepted and allowed within me to control me and to direct me to keep me enslaved within the mind as fear as opinions/beliefs/ideas instead of actual facts.

When and as I see myself connection a negative emotional energetic experience to the word SEX I stop and I breathe – I see and realize that I am connecting the negative emotional charge to the word SEX due to Past experiences in relation to the word SEX and that this is the present and thus  have a new moment to correct myself and to stop the enslavement of the past and move on, move forward within self-forgiveness of what I have accepted and allowed and to stop the creation of making sex bad/good and to keep it real as an act, a physical act between two beings that has agreed with one another to physically be intimate with one another to express/explore oneself with another. 

When and as I see others behave/act a certain way towards hearing or speaking the word sex as to how they have defined and mutilated the word within their heads/minds and created a warped definition of the word SEX within their mind from and as imagination/desire/fantasies which they were programmed with and brainwashed with from kids to adults through society through all means of media and forms of education/indoctrination , I stop and I breathe, I see and I realize that I have/am separating myself from others as what has been accepted and allowed within this world to exist, and that is what the cause of a shit load of abuse such as rape/molestation and violent crimes comes from/spawns from , and thus I Must take as them, as the characters  self-responsibility and stand one and equal as them as a correction and to present that correction to myself and to live it as myself first and to change and to as an example show the solution to the world and that it is possible to change and stop the abuse that we all do not like and yet call it human nature yet it is in fact just preprogrammed through teaching/learning, and that we are all equally responsible and can stop the excuses of its just our nature, when the evidence all around us show that it isn’t nature, as NO animals on earth does what the human does and they are nature, and our problem is just getting worse because our education system has always been fucked – showing and exposing that our education as our brainwashing/conditioning is actually where we create our human nature and thus human nature is something we create and accept and allow to BE so, not because it is so.

Day 404 - Word Sex Part 2

Day 404 – SEX Part 2

Read Day 403 – SEX Part 1 to get a complete over view of what is being continued here.

Looking at the sex educations/impression I got from my child hood years was as follow. I first heard/red the word and then came the reactions/meanings, so my first impression was within how the word was used or reacted towards, it is bad, it is dirty, it is not for children, it is secret, it is special, it is all these things except what it really is and it is something secret, it is something “kids” do not talk about or mention in front of adults as it is an Adult subject.

So what happens then is the Kids go to one another/each other and among the kids there are discussion, miss information based on what has been told/heard/red/seen depending on each child’s “life” there will be a particular influence from this subject. And here among the kids ALL these particular Ideas/opinions/beliefs come together and the kids make a very weird stew of what SEX means and what it is.

Then comes the point of – each one for himself, after these discussion the kids will be by themselves at many points in their life, and when kids are by themselves and can’t really go talk to an Adult or someone about what they just heard, it is kept in their heads/minds and there it becomes one self’s opinions/ideas/beliefs and so connect all this weird stuff to sex. Circling around in one’s mind.

All this is possible because there is a separation between Adults and Children, the adults became contaminated and they know they are contaminated and thus they want the kids to remain kids, stay away from such subjects as sex for as long as possible, and thus the kids are never to speak of sex, mention sex and the parents will never use that word in front of the kids deliberately, maybe not even with each other/partners. 

This is all to show how the secrets begin and when shit is done in secret it becomes dangerous, look at the world, all the sickening things that is related to sex happens in secret, it cannot happen in public, because in public, or in the eye of everyone there will be witnesses and there will be consequences, and it won’t be possible because I know when I have to see shit like that in public happening or about to happen, I will stop it, I will intervene and make sure the person goes away to a correctional facility and only once proven corrected will such a being return to public, and all will know who this person is and he will have to live self-forgiveness.

I am not saying that sex must be done in public, I am saying, lets not create a secret mind about/in relation to sex as this is where the bullshit/abuse flows out from, let all be known to all about sex, NOT porn, sex, what it really is, a Physical action between partners – based on an agreement both made and all is aware of this agreement, so that we all know no one is fucking around – and thus sex is really simple from that perspective. 

Back to the main point - so here I am looking at the WORD sex, what have I connected to sex as a child, that first impression, that moment/memory that was pressed into me and thus defined sex for me, and then I accepted and allowed it to be so. This first moment that I can remember clearly was mentioned in the previous blog.

Self - forgiveness   

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the first time I heard and spoke the word sex there was nothing connected to it but the curiosity to know/understand the word. and everyone’s behaviors/reactions towards the word, and thus what I then afterwards connected to the word sex is not real but all simply opinions/beliefs/ideas of and from other peoples mind’s and not based on real facts as to what sex is/mean.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the word naughty as a definition of what sex is to the word sex through how I saw others talk/mention it as if it is naughty and must be kept quiet.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the IDEA/belief that I must keep quite within using the word SEX as it might get me in trouble and thus only use it around those that I know can’t get me in trouble, such as friends or in secret.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the experience of “getting in trouble” to the word sex when and as it is spoken out by a child and the adults may hear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a curiosity towards the word sex and thus what sex is in the end, through how I saw others talk/mention the word sex, thus energetically being influenced by others.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that when I spoke out the word SEX for the first time without having a clue what it yet means that there was nothing attached to it, it was just a word that still needed to be defined and thus the word sex is not wrong but what we as humans connect to it as our thoughts as Ideas/opinions/beliefs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into Fear when and as I said the word sex out loud and all the other kids/people around me shouted shut up don’t say that so loud, the teacher will hear you, not even knowing what I had to fear yet, but just that it was something to fear and that there will be authorities involved that will punish me for this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect a fearful energetic experience towards the word sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect a emotional energetic charge towards the word sex of it being bad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take what others have shown me as their behaviors and sounds towards and within the word sex and made it my own, believing that what others connect within a word must be what the word stands for/mean or imply.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear speaking and using the word as a normal word as all words to speak as a reference to something in public or in front of others believing that it will and might trigger a opinions/belief/idea and thus a reaction within them that might cause conflict, seeing and realizing that this is simply my reactions as my beliefs/ideas/opinions that I have created in relation to the word sex from past experiences/influences that I am projection onto others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ban the word sex from my word usage and thus always avoid any such topics that might come us, as I have defined the word sex as sacred/secret and not a subject to bring up, as I will always feel I am a kid in relation to this word as I have defined this word when I was a kid.

To be continued.

Day 403 - SEX Part 1

SEX is a very very extreme point within this world and how sex in fact is a major factor within this world, and what decisions people make each day, if not in each moment towards a future outcome or current outcome. 

I remember as a teenager, my every move/decision was and came from the starting point of sex, since money wasn’t an issue back then as my parents took care of that for me while being in school etc, sex took over my life, meaning – I was hunting/scavenging and looking for opportunities and moments where there is a possibility of sex happening all the time. And that is how I remember ALL my friends; yes it includes girls as well that was my friends. 

So what am I writing about, I am writing about the WORD SEX – because the word sex has all these meanings attached to it  from all those past memories and experiences and influences from family/school/friends/society.

Then there are even more and bigger causes to the problem we are facing today with SEX, which is culture and religion and family values that are all based on Ideas/beliefs/opinions and not on facts, where for instance the child will be taught that SEX can only happen after marriage, or weird shit like sex is dangerous with lots of stories and bullshit to back that up, or then there is the preserving your virginity thing that is imprinted into all males and females from the people that has gone before them, because of mistakes they have made, already implying we will make the same mistakes and thus we are the mistakes. 

And there are more of this going around all around – I remember the first time I ever heard the word sex and saw the word sex – I was eleven, our school class  went on a trip to a fun park in a bus we hired. As we all were sitting in the bus and talking and playing and just being kids, I heard some kids laughing, they then turned around and said hey guys, to the guys sitting behind me, look at this, they pointed at the back of one of the seats and said – it says SEX, and they all giggled, I looked at it and I was like, mmm what does that mean, so I asked out loud to the kids at the front, WHAT DOES SEX MEAN – almost everyone in the buss looked at me and said sssss almost immediately, the teacher stood up and said, BE QUITE, my friend next to me then said, Gian don’t you know what that means? I said NO, what does it mean, he said, sex is how babies are made, but it is also when a Male’s thing is put into a females thing and they go up and down. 

I was – ok so that’s it, he said yes, that is it, then we had conversations about it and what his cousins told him etc etc, and since that day I had the impression I can never say the word SEX, and if I do it must be in secret, and that it must be a secret thing, and that I can get into a lot of trouble talking about it. 

That is an example of what’s existent within cultures in relation to the word Sex and thus the act of sex and what has been placed onto sex by an entire society. 

When I see/sound the word Sex I hear– SEE  X – seeing the unknown, and this basically makes sense to me looking back into my past – SEX was this ONE thing that was Unknown. Educations did not teach me properly – the educations in general left out way to many gaps for anything else to take its place as Imagination and creating alternate realities about SEX. making shit up.

From what I have learned in school in math class is that X represented the unknown, anything can replace X, X is just a place holder – yes there is a math that tells us what the X will be or must be replaced by or to where the X must be moved, YET if your math isn’t good, then making mistakes with this X is eXtemely easy and will lead to consequences. In this case the Math which is taught by those that has gone before us and basically the whole educational system from home to school is… maybe there is no education. And we are just parroting shit. And thus teaching is nothing real about sex, just the basic shit and leaving everything else up to the imagination.

So here comes the purpose of finding the Unknown and what is there, why is it the unknown, why is it called private parts, why are those parts always covered, see this is like a perfect set up for anyone to make money on this point of not being educated, create pron, it exposed everything, it reveals the X (unknown) and it addddddddsssss a lot of Bullshit that fucks with everyone that watches it. 

Till here for now

To be continued.

Day 104 – Parents Held Accountable Part 3.

I commit myself to rebirth myself through writing/self forgiveness and to live the correction and as the physical and to become the living expression of/as life one and equal in all ways, so that when and as I bring a child into this world the child will not be nothing less than life as the physical as all that is here one and equal within full understanding of how everything here functions.

I commit myself to purify myself and to stop the mind as enslavement/limitation/mind control and to rebirth myself through writing/self-forgiveness and applying myself in and as the physical as that which is best for all life in all ways before I bring a child into this world.

I commit myself to educate myself effectively on what it actually in fact means to raise a child and what it actual implies in and as the physical and how raising a child is in fact, how the world will be as the result of the parent as the child.

I commit myself to show to parents that their children is but only products of who they are and that the world is an end result as the consequences of how the children was raised and that all parents is accountable for the way the world is.

I commit myself to investigate and to research how effective parenting must be applied to bring about a world that is best for all life and where each and every child is brought up/raised to be at their fullest potential as LIFE.

I commit myself to educate and inform all parents and soon to be parent that having a child isnt a right they have it is a responsibility they must prepare to take on as they must be prepared in all ways and only then through in fact being ready to have children that will be raised effectively and to their fullest potential and that will create and manifest a world that is best for all life in all ways and to show that any other way is abuse to the child and LIFE.

I commit myself to to show to all parents that children is a copy of who they are and that is the copy isnt what is best for all life then the world will only remain as hell and life as we know it will end.

I commit myself to show that all parents is accountable and that they are aware of what they are doing in their words and deeds.

I commit myself to show that parents that did not prepare for years on how to raise a child should never have a child unless they have gone through training and actually made a directive decision to have children within the starting point of what is best for all life as their self honesty.

I commit myself to educate myself on/in being an effective parent for when and as I have children within and as the principal of what is best for all life to create a child/adult that is a living custodian of earth and that is developed to his/her full potential in and as the physical.

Day 102 – Parents held Accountable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that parents have ALL the right in the world to raise their children as they want to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Justify that Parents have ALL the right in the world to raise their children as they see fit/want to because it is THEIR child.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Children does not belong to parents as each and every child is the future of all LIFE including me/animals/plants/earth even if it is someone else s child, if the child isn't raised within what is best for all life than the child will not be a child that considers all life which includes my life even if it isnt even my child, thus I am as everyone else equally responsible for the up bringing of all children and thus Parents can not have the right to raise their children as they see fit, as the child belongs to no one, as the child is everyone's future and not just the parents future, thus the child is of LIFE and the parents have the responsibility to teach this to their kids as what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief/see it as wrong when someone else tells parents how to raise their children, realizing that Parents have no fucking Idea how to raise children and yet they have children in the hope of knowing, thus teaching thechild everything they know in who knows what manners that is abusive, and obviously not creating a better world for all as the evidence is seen in how the world is currently now due to parents raising children, as the parents are the results of their parents (sins of the fathers)

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Parents decide the future of the world in how they teach and bring up their kids, showing in clear evidence as the world exist currently that what children is/are being taught is pure evil and not what is best for all life and thus all Parents MUST/will be held accountable.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that Children that becomes adults is the product of the parents and thus the world is a end result of the children that the parents brought up and thus it is in clear evidence showing that how parents are teaching and bringing up children isn't effective at all or changing the world or in the best interest of all life, but in self interest that is evil and bringing the destruction of life as we know it. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that Parents are responsible in all ways.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to question parents and how they raise children within the belief that how they bring up their child is holy and sacred and their right as GOD to create their child in their image and likeness as they please even if it brings a world of evil for all as the world currently is the evidence of how parents raise children.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that a child can only be that which the parents teach the child and how they raise the child in the physical.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that children can not be anything else than what parents are teaching and showing and thus the world can not be anything else than what parents are teaching the children that grow up and run the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear parents and questioning their parenting, realizing that as long as I do not stand up and question and say look at what you are doing look at the world it is the result of what you are doing that I am accepting and allowing the abuse equally and not allowing change to come to earth before it is to late. thus equally my self responsibility.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to TRUST parents instead of trusting myself, and how they teach children and bring them up, realizing that the parents does not have a fucking clue what they are doing and thus can only teach the child what they have been taught and how they were taught and thus only creating copies, and so I see and realize that the parents that was and is part of the world and how it exist now and they they are the once that created it and kept it they way it is and did not being forth a better world for all life, that they will in their teaching only great children that turns into adults that will only continue the evil cycle that is destroying life. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to respect parents and how they bring up children while the children they bring up does not even respect LIFE as a indication to who the parent is, realizing that Parents MUST be held accountable and they WILL be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Standing up to the parenting within this world in the fear of that all parents will take it personally and not be able to recognize the simple truth of that how they raise children is how the world is/will be and that the evidence is here that it is not effective at all and that parenting as we know it is evil, there is no other way of saying it. 

To be continued.