OH no, Coldness is touching me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as just a tiny litte bit of cold air or wind touches my body to immediately want to get a jacket on or something warmer just not to experience the coldness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to FEAR shiffering and being cold when and as cold air or wind touches my skin. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike even a little bit of cold ait touching my skin.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that coldness is bad for me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that cold air or wind touching my body is a bad sign and thus I want to get warm as fast as possible.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I experience myself as cold then I can get sick or ill, or even not be able to move or do anything properly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that coldness Is something that is against me, that wants to harm me, that wants to put me to sleep or out of action, to not work and be effective.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a negative state of mind when and as I experience just a little bit of cold air on my skin or a cold breeze passing by where I then thing, OH no, It I cold, I am not going to be able to move and work outside effectively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to HATE the physical experience I go into when and as a cold breeze or wind is passing by and touches my skin.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike and have a negative mind set about my fingers and body feeling stiff and cold when and as it I cold, where I think thing and blame the cold for me not being able to effectively use my body or do things, such as typing or working with tools and to within this go into a giving up mode of rather not wanting to do anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see it as too much work to breathe and to relax my body when and as it is cold and I am experiencing myself as cold, to relax my body and to focus on the breathing and to not let my body tense up within the experience of coldness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to JUDGE coldness as BAD and negative based on how I experience myself within the cold, seeing and realizing that cold is here is it an expression of life it isn’t good or bad, it is something I can also enjoy if I drop the brainwashing and conditioning that I as the mind have placed on the cold as a way to attempt to manipulate myself and my environment to get things to be my way.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accept and allowed myself to see and realize fully my responsibility within my experience that happens within me as my thoughts, my emotional state when and as there is cold, and thus how I as my internal experience effects how I as the body experience the cold one and equal, and thus I see and realize that I can actually learn from the cold as the cold exposes ME and different parts of me and what emotional states I exist as hidden, that comes out when it is cold.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to just accept the experiences within me when it is cold as it is cold, and to not investigate what is coming up within me that determines my experience within coldness, where coldness has now become this whole thing instead of just cold, and expression of life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not challenge who I am within cold and to just run with it a normal, because everyone else seems to also find it normal and have the same and similar experiences and thus mine must be real and true and valid, never challenging every part of ME that comes up and exposes itself with different weather.

I commit myself to check myself and who I am and the experiences I have when and as I am cold.

I commit myself to breathe and to walk through and understand the emotional experiences that comes up when and as I am cold.

I commit myself to challenge the back chat that comes up as my living and behaviour when and as it is cold and to check what is real as ME and what is a design to further control me as the mind energy slave to consciousness where apparently the physical is the problem and causes me to experience myself certain ways within me.

Day 563 - Hating to be around People/humans

Ok, so I must admit, I do not enjoy being around other people, that’s just me being honest – OH wait, Honesty is actually me lying to myself, because when I really look at it, I do not hate being around other people, I must now really get to being self-honest with myself, to dig deeper than that feeling I am hiding behind and keep using as excuses and reasons and justification for why I am the way I am, OH yes, being self-honest is looking beyond those comforting points, if you dare you might have a moments scare, but I am telling you that if you push through to being self-honest, to look beyond the feelings and emotions and thoughts and to see what is really the issue here. It comes back to MYSELF always.

So I have an experience inside of MYSELF when I am around other people, that is the first indication, the feeling/emotions/experience is within me, my thoughts are keeping it there in place, and some random memory that I have no clue of is running in the back ground where I defined myself within a certain moment within around people/humans in the past that is now still playing out in the present. So what is it that I have created within me as not liking and thus hating about being around other human beings? Answering those questions for myself, I will find that it will reveal points within me that I have separated myself from and thus created friction within my reality, which started first within me. So let’s dig in with Self forgiveness to get to see creation being undone as what isn’t best for all including myself in action and re-birthing self as LIFE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed This HATE to just exist within me when and as I am around other people, seeing it as normal and just as who I am naturally.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to question this “natural me” that I have been living for a long time as not liking and thus hating being around other human beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make this “not liking” and thus hating being around other human being about other human beings instead of taking the point back to myself and to see who I am within being around other human beings that create this hate within me of being around them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from other human beings within myself as being so different and not the same, that when I am around other human being I am in a constant state of denial and separation, which I know is me not standing one and equal as others and to face myself as others and thus I create a friction within me of hating other human beings for what they are showing of me to myself that exist within this world that I must equally take self-responsibility for within myself as all life, to truly be able to stand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that me hating being around other human beings is me hating myself as who I am around other human beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project my inner conflicts and mind bullshit onto other human beings, no matter how bad or shit other humans may be, what I am experiencing within myself as judgment and gossip is what is making human beings shit and bad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I am around other people to not want to hear them gossip and talk about other people as it tires me out and becomes a burden within me to have to listen to this. Not seeing and realizing that when and as I am listening to other human gossiping or talking about other people that I am in my mind doing exactly the same thing as what I am judging them for, thus I am not liking who I am within such a situation.

I commit myself to when and as I am around other people that gossip and talk about other people To stop any form of judgment within me toward them and what they are doing and to breathe an focus on being here as the correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to how people talk about other people in the open or in secret towards me or with others and to within this reaction that I have not like myself and thus not like giving away my authority as Breath to stand as the solution and thus to not like myself being around other human beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I am around other people and their behavior is that of the mind, which is sexual, degrading, or very blunt with what is going on in their mind within their behavior, to feel intimidated as I have judged them within my mind as less than me and as not ‘decent” human beings – where I gossip in my mind and placing myself above them, where their behavior is attempting to bring me down within my mind, seeing and realizing that this is me separating myself from the accepted and allowed nature of the human within myself where I have sunned away those parts within myself and thus have not yet dealt with myself as who I am as that behavior to effectively direct and deal with others within such a behavior and thus create the idea/belief that I hate being around other people/humans as a way to hide from that part of myself that I must still stand one and equal to as myself.

I commit myself to when and as I am within a situation where people are within behaviors that I have judged as not decent and that isn’t nice, to take such a moment and to stop the point within me as separation, to now not participate but to take the points of reactions I see and to see why I react, to realize that they are showing me a part of me that I can now challenge within myself to forgive and to stand from within and to live as the correction where I enable myself to also help others to correct themselves as I live it for myself, to stop all judgment and to actually take on myself as all life that is here one and equal.