Day 55 - Life is all about sex part 3

Day 55 - Life is all about sex part 3

This is a continuation of Day 54 - life is all about sex part 2.

Ok so I left where I discussed and applied self forgiveness on my firs relationships I had as my parents and how I learned through them in their behavior/words and how this plays a role in how I have identified relationships and how it should be and how the other person should be and should not be and how the other person should look and not look.

It is quite obvious that a child learns all the time in their environment, so if you have these two beings as parents around you the whole time the first seven years of your life, you are obviously learning the most from them, mostly everything, the whole foundation, this is how I am going to go into the points of my sexual life, and how I as a male have made life's purpose all about sex all the time.

Here I will focus on the points of how I have identified relationships through my parents relationship as I grew up through simply looking at who I am currently within the point, because who I am now within relationships and who I was as a kid is still the same, I will look at both points of the coin, the polarities play outs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify relationships as two people that fit together in their personalities and within their physical appearances.

I forgive myself that I have connected two being in a relationship and how their bodies look like and how they physically behave together with their physical bodies as a indication to how a relationship must look like where two people must be attracted to each other physically.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect how tow people hug and act together with their physical bodies and how they touch each other to how physical bodies must look like within a relationship and that any other physical body with another that isnt the same can not work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect how the mother looks and how the father looks physically as to how a accepted couple must look like, and thus limiting myself to any other expressions within the physical as having a agreed relationship with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imprint the picture of the mother and father holding and kissing and hugging each other as the perfect couple picture and thus within aging I would seek this picture as my relationships.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imprint parents and how they are NOT holding and touching and kissing apothecary and how they behave towards each other as not being a good relationship either because the father does not want to touch the mother for not fitting his desired women or the other way around and as aging comes I will seek for the opposite relationships in picture presentation and behavior/personalities.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify how relationships must not be through how the parents acted towards each other in words and deeds and to within my life seek/desire/want/need the opposite and accordingly create my fantasies and desires for sex/relationships.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that how my parents acted towards each other and me as a baby and how I took it in accordingly as positive or negative as what the parents showed me in their living as the examples that I would at a older age seek the same or the opposite depending on the relationship i have created towards their behaviors and what I decided on within myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that how the mother looks like/acts in personality/ or how she even smells will determine through my acceptance and allowance what I like/want/need/desire in women as I age either in polarity or the exact same dependent on the relationship I created towards it all.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that how the father looks like/acts in personality or how he even smells will determine through my own acceptance and allowance how I as a male will be once I come of age within a relationship and towards women and what I want/need/desire either in polarity or the exact same dependent on the relationship I created towards it all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify good relationships ad two beings that is physically attracted to each other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify a relationship that I must have as where the female is attracted to me and me to her.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify relationships as tow beings that must be able to get turned on by each other through how they physically look.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships that work as being two beings that are physically attracted to certain parts of each other such as the legs, the torso the face or any other parts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as two beings that can adore each other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as two people who can only have fun with each other as touching and playing together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as where the male must be attracted to the female.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as where the female must be in love with the male and be physically attracted to each other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as male/female and that they must be able to laugh together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify relationships as where the male must be attracted to the females body for it to work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify relationships as where the female must be skinny and the male must be fit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as to where two being can only care for each other and no one else as that would be sinful to the other partner and they will be jealous and sad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify relationships as two beings that must be sexually attracted to each other all the time in each and every touch.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships as two being that must find each other sexy all the time or it wont work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make/connect sexy as being relevant to a relationship, realizing that it creates a mind relationship instead of a relationship that is based on what is best for all life in and as the physical that does not support limitation and control a the mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imprint what sexy is every time the father told the mother you are sexy and how the father held the mother and to see this picture as sexy and what a female looks like that is sexy and what a male looks like that gets sexy females.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have identified relationships according to pictures/words.

Ok so this is it for now, to be continued.

Stay tuned and be sure to follow the links to get more insight/support/assistance so we can realize yourself as life and end the mind picture enslavement based on limited energy that we function with instead of breathe by breath in and as the physical. 

next I will be going into actual memories of childhood.

Day 54 – Life is all about sex part 2

This is a continuation of Day 53 – Life is all about sex part 1

Ok so here I am going to go into my past, back in time to see where it all started, how did life become all about sex, how did it happen that there is this curtain hanging in-front of my eyes the whole time that has sex on it, like its all I see everywhere. 

Should I go back to the first time I discovered masturbation or did it start even further, I mean the brainwashing, the mind control through pictures and through TV and through the simple behaviors of people within my environment, or do I have to first look at the big picture, because i notice it is quite difficult to see the real first time it started.

I am going to look at the bigger picture first, when I look at it I was born into this world with everything that is here was already here, sex addicts already lived around me, people that watched and masturbated to porn already lived around me, I as a child already interacted with them , I hear them talk, I heard their jokes, I observed their behaviors, I noticed their magazines, I saw what they watched on TV and made comments on – all of this was obviously the first imprints already at the start of my life.

Now here is the interesting point I notice – girls and boys at a young age are thought this is a boy and this is a girl, we are always dressed differently and we always have different colors for each gender, males usually wore blue and girls had red or pink, how weird, boys always wore pants and shirts an girls had other different types of cloths.

Within the dress code as children the parents (adults) were already giving the children signals that there is something different, this obviously creates curiosity/indifference, I am talking about age's below five, this is where I can see the point came in when a boy and girls at a young age will be somewhere and then they will say, show me yours and I will show you mine, lets see what the adults are hiding and dressing us up differently for.

The next point I see is mommy and daddy kissing, hugging, holding each other and how they are towards each-other, this gives a clear indication of how “male” and “female” must be towards each other – I remember when I was six years old me and a buddy of mine went behind the doll house with a girl that was a year older than us and we kissed the girl, you know, doing what the parents do – it creates a curiosity.

All the above points I mention is but small point I see that gives the foundation already of male must be attracted to female and female must be attracted to male – already creating this connection within the child as it must be a “attraction”instead of what is practical through their behavior and words towards each other - and making it a prominent point in what comes ahead in “Life is all about SEX”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that Males “must be “attracted” to females for them to be together.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to “like” females instead of living what is best for all life within common sense and practicality and what works, limiting myself to only what I like through what I have observed and imprinted within me from childhood from observing adults and parents as my first impressions in life and what life is all about. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be brainwashed through the behaviors of adults and parents through taking what they are living as what the meaning of life must be, giving my own self honesty up and away to trust and ignorance.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept and allow everything parents acted out and said and do as the truth and how things must be.

I forgive myself that I have connected the word you look stunning that my father used when he hugged my mother and thus connected the word stunning to the image and likeness of what my mother is, thus believing that my mother was and is the image and likeness of what the word stunning means, thus seeing and realizing that as I grow up I will look for stunning girls that only looks like my mom.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the word beautiful to how a mother looks every-time a dad came into the house and kissed his wife and said you look beautiful, realizing that now as I have accepted beautiful as my mother being the living definition I will seek out girls that look like the mother’s image and likeness and only be willing to kiss and hug such girls as they will be beautiful.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the word sexy to how a mother looks every time the dad told the mother you look sexy, realizing that as this is my first impression of the word sexy , I related it to how the mother looks like, and thus giving sexy the image of the mother as the father/male that is the same as me have given the mother, believing that I as a male as the same as the father must now also call what the mother looks like as her image and likeness as being sexy.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that when I was a young kid from birth till seven years old everything happening in my life between that age is what my foundation will be for LIFE, realizing that as my life has only been consumed by sex it is a indicator what the most prominent building blogs were in my first seven years as the relationships that interacted within my environment and how I learned and made the connections as all life at that age and time was in fact teaching and programming me through their actions/words/interactions and how I accepted and allowed things.  

I forgive myself that I have not realized that all my base programming comes from childhood, what I like, how I like it, why I like it, how I made the connections.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my childhood for granted just because I can not remember much as not being the cause, realizing that it is quit obvious that everything started there in the family within my environment and the relationships that was formed there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to NOT realize that all my sexual desires/wants/needs was already programmed within me within my first seven years of my life and that it activated later in my life as I have made it my own and started living it.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that what I like about females and why and what I am attracted to within females comes from my one and only example I had as a relationship within my first years as my parents – Mother and father.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to refuse to belief that I have created all my sexual desires from my parents relationship and how they were as the example in word and deed. 

I forgive myself that I have not seen and realized that the words and deeds that came from my parents originated within/from their minds, thus it is their mind consciousness systems I am being programmed with as the mind consciousness system enslavement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that I am a programmed robot and that all fantasies/desires/wants/needs for sex comes from my parent s and that it is not my own but their that I have accepted and allowed to be mine. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that the boobs/ass/legs/body I like within females came from my mom and dads relationship as I learned from them in their behavior and interactions what is likes and what is not.

Also consider – if you did not have parents the influence would be from obviously the people that was there in your first seven years and so on. 

To be continued..

Day 53 - Life is all about sex, Part 1

Everyone I knew including myself, we all only look for that lover = sex partner, we do this from young ages till we die, we start seeking sex everywhere, we only see sex, we see a coke bottle as a females body, we see boobs/ass/legs in everything, when we talk to girls we focus on their bodies most probably all the time. 

Till we die, is this the purpose that God has made for our existence – I mean people always told me god's plan for you only he knows, yet everything in my life was only to obtain sex, get sex, the way I walked, the way I talked, the things I did, the sports I loved, the type of cigarettes I smoked, it all was a personality I created a EGO that is like a trap, to get that one girl to love me and give me sex.

Every time I said I love you to a girl, there was this little hidden voice, desire behind those words, saying “i want to fuck you” I want to have sex with you, can I have sex with you now, I love you alright can we do it already. - what made gods plan so special if sex was the only thing running my life, I became christian to get sex - it worked, I do not belief in god though.

I can not completely speak for the girls here, but I guess they have it similar.

I know all guys are the same, I hang out with multiple, thousands of different guys in my life, we are all the same, SEX SEX SEX seriously. Males talk about sex in everything, I remember in grade 7 two friends of mine that was a little bit over weight could push their chests together and it looked like boobs, they would do this in-front of each other and actually end up “pretending having sex with each other, at school, with cloths on, but still, it shows you at what age kids have already made/decided sex is what life is all about. 

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that LIFE is all about chasing after sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that LIFE is all about getting sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief males and females are created only for the purpose of finding and making sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see females as sexual objects and that is their purpose here on earth to be used for sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be brainwashed through a educational system that has no true integrity on LIFE and real values but to only teach us about the system and survival and where sex is left for each person to be something hidden that consumes our life's and become the one thing we crave as we were never properly openly educated about it, it was mostly kept secret and left in the hands of kids to do and make of it as they please, the perfect place to breed all kinds of weird shit, addictions possessions etc which is only an indicator that even the adults do not know shit and are the same, sins of the fathers.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be brainwashed by society and the TV,movies,media that sex is all a male wants and needs and have to get in his life to live LIFE, 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consume my life with only thinking about sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consume my mind with thoughts/back chat and pictures of sex everyday as if is all life is about and can be, blinding me from life here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fill myself up with desired pictures that got brainwashed into me through pictures I watched such as porn and movies or magazines and to literally make the desire my life, my goal, my achievement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make life decisions based on my sexual desires, realizing that if I make a life decision only because I belief taking that life route will bring me sex with a certain desire I have that only exist in my mind, it will most probably never happen and thus I compromised and sabotaged my whole life for a picture.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act and change my behavior in certain ways to attract a female that I desire for sex and to within that develop “another personality for myself for that particular desire, realizing that I am only creating multiple personalities for myself according to all different sexual desires I have, and in the end may end up with a disease caused through my own doing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to literally mind fuck myself through creating all of me as who I am as a certain personality/personalities to get sex in my life, separating myself from all life and only to exist as a picture seeking another picture that will simply end at death as I had no relevance to life at all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to CHANGE around certain women in the hope for sex – future relationship to gain sex, realizing the fact that I could change for that must tell me there is something really wrong, as I have secret thoughts,back chat, desires that lurk within me that no one knows about till it is activated when I am around the desired picture – exposing me as the demon I am as the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and built my personality/ego according to porn and how I see sex id done in the picture screen that I am watching believing it is real, and when I encounter a real living women in the flesh I access this ego/personality to hope for the gain of sex, realizing that I am playing out like a robot and that if the moment of sex comes I will be less than the porn I watched, because the porn was all a show and I made it real in my mind and actually accordingly designed myself to a picture show just for sex.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only thing about sex when I am talking to females.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to present myself as someone that does not want sex when talking to females while in my secret mind I think and compare and look and only have sex on my mind, realizing that this is one step away from what a rapist is/does/do and that it is all programmed into me through TV.movies/porn/magazines and the educational system in this world and thus it isnt real and its all only in the mind to enslave and imprison self to a limited reality so that self can not realize self as LIFE as all that is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only analyze females when I see them and to see if they match any of my mind created desires for what I want and if sex with the female is possible and if I would want to do it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only interact with females that I belief I have a chance of having sex with and ignore the rest.

OK so this was a into to what I am going to start writing about, I basically touched each point here in a self forgiveness statement, I am not going to make a series of blogs here on each point I touched, giving a little bit of info and then deconstructing the points with self forgiveness. 

So stay tuned and lets show how fucked we are as males as ego and that we can rebirth and change yourself, I start with myself. 

I also strongly suggest to follow the hyper links for far more support and assistance.

To be continued.

Day 52 – There must be something more out there.

Day 52 – There must be something more out there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire for something more out there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge what is here as being insignificant, realizing that I am only judging myself and who I am as not being enough, thus searching for it out there in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not being significant and thus all that is here as LIFE as not being enough and so create the desire/want/need for something more OUT there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from what is here in the search for something out there.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that what is out there or what is here is the same as I will always remain with myself, thus realizing it does not matter what is out there as being more as I will still remain with me within my own self judgments that caused the desire to seek something out there to make me more, to make me feel more.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that LIFE HERE can not be all that life is, realizing that I have separated myself from LIFE as all LIFE HERE and so I am not even aware of all that is here through seeking for something more out there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be brainwashed by T.V and media to belief that there is something more than just my life and that I ma insignificant if I do not find that something more, creating a life or rushing and of seeking the whole time, Missing Life here as who I am in oneness and equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that only within the mind where we create alternate dream worlds can we create what is here as not being enough, as we seek this better life, this life that is more constantly till death, only to realize we never lived and only seek.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for the false images that the TV and Media portray as “THE LIFE” that we must all try and achieve to live, realizing that this is part of the game to keep people enslaved to their minds in search for something more than what life is here as who we ARE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that as long as we are all enslaved within a capitalism system where some must have nothing for others to have everything to achieve a different life that we create in our minds as dreams and fantasies is only a lie until we change the system to a money system that is best for all life where all life can achieve a better life at the same time such as the equal money system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to live a glamorous life just to hide who I am and not having to face who I am as LIFE as all LIFE as I know money is the key to life and thus realizing that giving money to all equally is the only way for a real life where all life has a dignified life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that there is a better life for everyone within a capitalism system, realizing capitalism is based on self interest and it is not within everyone self interest that all life has equal living as it will take away what those has that has more than half the worlds fair share in resources and money.

I forgive myself that I have not realized that as long as I search for a better life out there while being in a capitalism system I have been brainwashed through TV and the media to remain enslaved in hopes and dreams to a money system that only ever helps the few already in power.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief that if some could have made a better life for themselves out there then so can i, not realizing that this is part of the enslavement game that the elite plays to give false hope and fantasies to people in poverty or a not so good life to always stay where they are hoping, dreaming and just working their asses off to make more money for the elite.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be blind to the truth of Capitalism within false  images within my mind as brainwashing through TV and the media that is constantly portrayed into our brains to keep us enslaved to a system that is designed for only a few to feast of the many.

I commit myself to show an reveal that any and all dreams and hopes of a better life within capitalism is part of the enslavement to keep people doing what they are doing and to work harder and harder and make money for the elite,

I commit myself to show that everyone is working their asses off daily within a system that promises a better life, yet no one sees that it is impossible for everyone to have a better life within capitalism and that this is part of the enslavement to keep people working to make money for the few that already have billions.

I commit myself to show and reveal that TV and the media is part of the brainwashing where they portray perfect pictures in the movies and TV series to show people what they can have the whole time, while the rich clearly knows it is impossible for all to have what they have and thus they do it deliberately to keep people enslaved to their games. 

I commit myself to show that only within an equal money system can all have a great amazing life as all the resources will be equally distributed between all people and that only through stopping Capitalism can we all achieve the dream we all have, a better life where we can live life instead of fighting and struggling and working out asses of for it, and to show that such a system is possible this life if we stand together and end the brainwashing and mind control within yourself.